Andy Samberg oneshots :/

I'm fine - Andy Samberg

*Warning: mentions
of anxiety and depression*
__

God, I hate parties.
I hate them so much.

There's always a lot of people I don't know, mostly drunk or high, that play stupid games like truth or dare, dance to some awful music, or just make out on the couch.

And since I don't drink, like these games or hook up with random people I just met, I always, ALWAYS, end up alone in a corner of the room with my glass of diet coke in hand, while everyone else's having the time of their lives.

I fucking hate it.

I hate being a bookworm that likes reading with some chill music playing in the background while outside is raining. Or watching Netflix instead of going out with my friends. Or even draw something on my notebook, instead of having to talk to people.

Because when I end up in these situations, I don't know what to do.

I feel out of context.
And I kinda am, aren't I?

I mean, the people around me surely don't watch anime or sitcoms, so there's  no way I can start a conversation. And if there's someone that listens to the same music I listen to, they surely are pretty shit-faced, by now.

There's no way I can win.

...Why did I come anyway?
I knew this was gonna happen, it always does.

I take a sip of my diet coke, probably the drink with less alcohol in the whole flat, and look around.

At the other end of the room, chatting and laughing with some of his friends, there's Andy, my best friend. He's the one that convinced me to come.

He always tries to involve me in what he does, to get me to go outside and do shit, even tho I would totally prefer not to, and, well... this is an example of that.

I don't know why he does this, he probably just doesn't like the thought of me being alone, but still... why bother taking me here, if then you're gonna leave me?

You know I'm not going to start doing something by myself, I'm not that kind of person. I'm not an extrovert, the opposite. I'm, like, the most shy and introverted person you can find on the whole planet.

I sigh.

How did I let him convince me?
I could've just said no, or that I had stuff to do. I could've just lied.

...Ugh, who am I kidding?
I would never do that.

Deep down, I know why I came, after all. I just don't want to admit it.

I can't lie to him.
For two main reasons.
One: he knows me so well that he can immediately when I am.
And two: I just... can't.

Everytime I see his eyes, and the hope that I'll say yes when he asks me to come to this things I feel so powerless...

I love him too much to let him down.

So, instead of doing what I would like to do on a Saturday evening, I'm here, in a stranger's apartment, with strangers all around me, at a party I didn't even want to come to.

Yeah...

"Hey, everything ok?" Andy asks me.

I quickly wake up from my trance, and realize I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't even realize Andy had walked over here.

He's sitting next to me, right now, a soft smile on his face.

That damned smile...

"O-oh... oh, y-yeah, don't worry" I stutter, a bit startled.