Andy Samberg oneshots :/

Chasing Perps - Jake Peralta

"Morning, motherfuckers!" Jake shouted, entering the bullpen.

"Goodmorning to you, Jake!" Boyle happily answered, as he came out of the break room, with a toast in his hand.

"Language, Peralta"

"Oh, hey captain!" he smiled "Wass' up?"

"You're ten minutes late"

"Yeah, I know, sorry. I-

"Get to work, detective" Holt dismissed him, going back into his office.

Jake sighed, and sat down at his desk, nodding to Amy.

"Well, he seems in a good mood... or doesn't... he's really difficult to read..."

"Hey!" Y/n said, walking towards him.
She bended over a little, and pecked his lips, quickly pulling away.

"Hey babe!" he smiled.

"Haven't you seen each other already this morning?" Amy asked, confused.

"Oh, no, not today. I had some paperwork left to do yesterday, so..." she answered.

"...About that, are you free later?" Jake continued

"I think so, yeah. What did you have in mind?"

"Well, I thought we could stay together, tonight... you know, watch a movie, order a pizza..."

"Yeah, sounds nice!"

"...My place?"

"Sure, Jakey" she smiled, kissing him again.

"You guys are so cute!" Charles said, excited.

"Who cares about cute, call me when you grab each other's asses" Rosa said, as she walked closer to them, folding her arms.

"What makes you think we don't?" Y/n smirked, making Jake blush.

"That's my girl!" she grinned.

"Guys! Come on, back to work!" Terry shouted.

"Right, sorry sarge!"
__

"Captain, what's up?" Jake asked, entering Holt's office with y/n.

"Goodmorning, detectives. I have a case for you"

"Oh, great! What is it?"

"A robbery. The details are in the file" the captain continued, handing her a folder "I suggest you go on the crime scene, first"

"Yes sir" Jake said "We'll go there immediately"

"Ok, dismissed"

The two detectives nodded, and left the office, going back into the bullpen.

"Jake" y/n called him, pulling his hoodie's sleve a little.

"What, babe?"

"I'm so excited!!! Our first case together!" she whispered, smiling.

"I know, right?!" he smiled back.

"Come on, let's go to the crime scene!"
__

They entered the devasted shop.

All around them, broken glass and empty shelves, where once were the stolen jewels.

Some of the uniformed officers stood outside, and kept the few pedestrian that stopped to see what happened away, while the others looked for clues.

"Ok, the officer who took the jeweller's statement gave me a list of what the robbers have taken... Some pearl necklaces, a couple diamond rings, five golden watches... not much, actually" she noticed, confused.