Okay, I'm going to admit, even I started cracking up while editing this chapter. WELP, here's how to annoy the hell out of people in the theater/cinema! =D
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1. Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!"
2. Go, "Oooooh..." whenever anyone kisses.
3. Clap when the good guy gets killed.
4. During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?"
5. Whenever the bad guy is doing something devious, say, "Watch out!
6. Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes.
7. Tell the man selling popcorn that the bathroom is flooding.
8. Yell out what is going to happen.
9. Wear a cape and when its your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman! Hahaha!" and run away.
10. Say that they cannot sit next to you because your invisible friend already is.
11. Yell "FIRE"
12. Use empty chairs next to you as catapults with candy. Aim at specific people behind you and see if you can hit anyone in the back row.
13. Wear 3d glasses. Complain loudly how bad the effect are.
14. Bring a flashlight. In the middle of the film do shadow puppets on the ceiling.
15. Bring a remote control. Complain that you can't change the channel.
16. Sit front row, the minute the movie starts run out screaming.
17. Every time a character's name is mentioned do the Richmeister. (for a guy named Nick say, the Nickmeister, the Nickenator, Nickarino...)
18. Bring a beach ball. Toss it around.
19. Try to start a wave.
20. Become a bookie. Take bets on who will die first.
21. Sit in the back and throw eggs at the projection window.
22. Every time someone curses cover your ears and scream, "No profanity!"
23. Sing with the theme music.
24. Bring and use your own air freshener.
25. At the ticket booth, request tickets for really old movies, "I'll have two tickets for the Goonies."
26. Throw spit wads on the screen. Try throwing them on the upper part of the screen so they can't get scraped off.
27. Pass around a collection plate and see if anyone contributes.
28. Point a laser pointer at the screen. Give the audience a laser light show.
29. Bring a book and a bright light. Start reading the book with the light on. When someone asks you to turn out the light, yell, "Shh, I'm trying to read!"
30. Use binoculars. Stare at the audience rather than the movie.
31. Bring a Nintendo laser gun. Shoot at the screen. 32. Clap loudly every time a person walks into the theater late.
33. When someone kicks the back of your chair, scream, "Ahhh, whiplash!"
34. Ask what the theater's return policy on popcorn is. 35. Ask the person at the ticket window, "Do you work here?"
36. Start a standing ovation at the end of the movie.
37. Quote all dialogue 4 seconds after it is said on the screen.
38. Get up frequently and leave the room while singing "Let's all go to the Lobby to get ourselves a treat"
39. Every time there is a gun shot scream, "Hit the floor!", jump on the floor, and cover your head. 40. Wear one of those "cat in the hat" top hats.
41. Pretend your sleeping and snore as loud as you can.
42. Before the movie starts, stand up and recite lines of well known commercials.
"LIKE A GOOD NEIGHBOR, STARE FARM IS THERE!"
43. When someone walks by you in the aisle scream, "Ahhhhhh! These people smell!"
44. Play musical chairs, getting up frequently and moving right next to someone sitting by themself.
45. Bring your own beanbag chair and sit in the aisle.
46. During a love scene, stand up and run to the screen shouting "Hooters!"
47. Before the movie begins, tape fart cusions to various chairs in the theater room.
48. Bring a portable air popper, pop your own popcorn.
49. Bring a watergun and shoot it at anyone who begins talking.
50. Tie a cardboard box around your waist and walk up and down the aisles shouting "Get your popcorn, peanuts!"
YOU ARE READING
The BIG Book of RANDOM
RandomBasically where I let out my random energy and things I would like the world to know. CAUTION: Too many intakes of random jokes may result in LAUGHTER :D
