The Night Twins

Chapter 20

♠️ HIS POINT OF VIEW ♠️
Three. Three freaking hours that I've been trapped in the overcrowded waiting room. I'm losing my mind. Cole tried to take my mind of off her, but I can't. I mentally can't. My mind won't shut up. It keeps making me the bad guy like I stabbed her, but I didn't, but the guilt is still eating away at me. I asked so many nurses how she is, but she is still in surgery. It was a stupid pocket knife! What could be taking them so long?

I can't eat. I can't take a nap. I can't even see straight. The only thing I can do is pathetically sit in this old, worn out, chair. This is even worse than when Ryan beat her, making her unconscious because at least I didn't have to see the pain on her face, and hear her scream. What makes it even worse is that I had something to do, I had a purpose. I made her comfortable, fixed up her cuts, kissed her bruises and waited for her to wake up. Now I can't do anything. It's out of my hands. The only thing running through my mind is the blood. There was so much blood. Now you must be thinking that I'm in a gang, I see a lot of blood. That's true. I've seen enough blood to last me a lifetime, but this is different. She's different. None of us are innocent. Justina's innocent. She's just a bored girl looking for something to spice up her life. Not ruin it, but it seems that I already have ruined it. Does it make me selfish that I don't care? I can't leave her alone. I can't leave her grey blue eyes, her scattered freckles, wavy hair, pink lips. She's like my own personal addiction that I can't get enough of. I can't leave her, but right now I need her to not leave me alone another moment trapped in my head.

It's been another half an hour. My thoughts are out of control. I just want to scream and punch something. To feel physical pain so I can focus on that. Anything, but her. But that's Justina for you. She will keep worming into your thoughts without your permission and tease and haunt you until you want to forget about her, but that's the thing I don't want to forget her. I want the opposite. I want to feel her lips on mine, hear her laugh, see her smile, see her eyes light up when she's happy or excited or when the sun hits them at the perfect angle. I just want her both physically and mentally with me right now and not lying on a surgery table while who knows what is going on.

I'm actually pathetic. I shouldn't care for this girl the way I do. I shouldn't be sitting in this chair wallowing in self pity and regret. I should be home training or on a mission. She doesn't need me so why am I even here? Maybe because she does need you and maybe just maybe you care for her more than you admit. My subconscious chimes in once again. That's my breaking point. I can't stare at this wall with yellow fading paint for another minute. I have to get up and go.

"Excuse me? Where is the cafeteria?" I ask the nurse at her station.

She gives me a sad smile and points down the long hallway to my left. I start making my journey finally not thinking about anything but my need for a caffeine buzz in my system.

I'm gone for five minutes and in those five minutes the world started turning again. Cole comes running out of a room and drags me to the same door that he just came out of.

It didn't hit me of whose room I'm in until I look at the bed. There she is in a light blue hospital gown with dry tear stained cheeks, disheveled hair and exhausted eyes. I run up to her bed and hug her pulling my body close like I never want to let her go again, and the truth is that I don't.

"Hey Liam," she says, her voice barely above a whisper.

"Hmm?" I say too distracted to give her any other answer.

"Am I a good Mrs. Night?" she asks pulling away so I can look her in the face. When her words finally sink in my jaw hits the floor and I must've had confusion plastered on my face because Cole comes up and pats my back.