losin control; c. yelich. ✔️

37.

"FEEL MY HEARTBEAT RACING, BABY, YOU'RE ON FIRE."

A couple weeks had passed by and Christian was still healing after his season ending injury. He definitely beat himself up over it, all the scenarios going through his head on what he could've done better, what could've happened, how he could've prevented it, all these things just made his mind race. He was slowly starting to ween off the crutches, attending rehab everyday so he could build the strength back in his knee. Christian felt horrible at home; Not being able to do everything and help Viviana out hurt him. Eiley was getting bigger, Viviana was stressed, Christian just wished he could be more mobile and help her out. He's done what he can, but, he didn't feel it was enough.

****

Viviana laid Eiley down for her afternoon nap, grabbing the bag of candy and sweets she got for Christian to try and cheer him up. "Hi, handsome." She said, setting the bag on his nightstand and kissed the side of his head.

"Hey you.." Christian replied, "What's that?" He looked over at the bag, grabbing it and looked inside. "Aw, damn, baby, you didn't have to do this.." He looked up at her as she sat on the edge of the bed, next to him.

"I wanted to. I know you're feeling down lately, and I wish I could do everything to make you happy. I know this injury is pulling you down, but you're getting better! Your knee is getting stronger and I'm proud of you for that." She fixed the hoodie she was wearing, "You beat yourself up a lot over this injury, and you really shouldn't...You are an amazing athlete, and this was just a freak accident."

Christian nodded, sighing, "Just sucks, because I want to be on the field, I want to be running around, I want to be able to help you around the house with Eiley. I feel fucking miserable I can't do that." Vivi put her finger over his lips.

"Sh. Don't you feel bad for anything, got me? I got everything all under control. Eiley's a simple girl, doesn't require much. I'm fine, baby. I'm taking care of you and Eiley. You do it for myself and Eiley, this is me returning the favor." She kissed his cheek then his lips. "I love you very much and I appreciate you. This is just my form of returning the favor."

He grabbed the pocket of her hoodie, pulling her back close by him and kissed her again. Christian pulled back, looking at her, "I love you too. And I appreciate you as well, I'm very thankful for you." He patted the spot next to him. "Come cuddle me, we can watch some movies." He said, smiling all cute at her.

Vivi smiled, "Let me go wash my face and change, okay? Then I'm all yours." She kissed his cheek, going into the bathroom to wash his face and change into one of Christian's t-shirts. She walked back in the bedroom and adjusted the pillow that laid under Christian's knee so it could be elevated while he laid in bed. "Do you need anything, baby?"

"Just my fiance next to me, then I'll be content." Christian said with a smile forming on his lips. Vivi got in bed next to him and he kissed her cheek. "You really are amazing, you know that?"

She rolled her eyes, smiling at him, "I am not anything compared to you. I know you want to help out, I know you want to be going around the house, making sure Eiley and I are okay. I want you to rest and heal up, but, I'm fine, baby." She kissed his temple, "I always appreciate you and everything you do. You could be coming home from a baseball game late at night and you still want to help us out."

Christian wrapped an arm around her, pulling Vivi close. "I mean, I am hoping to start slowly going without crutches, or just walk with one, but it sucks that I can't be moving around. Like you said, I'm always on the move. I feel bad because I can't get Eiley when she's crying in the middle of the night." He sighed.

"Don't you worry about anything but getting healed." She kissed his lips, softly. "You'll be back on your feet in no time."

****

Christian was finally walking off crutches, taking things slowly. Viviana was making sure he wasn't pushing himself too hard, she didn't want him to be sore and in pain while he's working to be walking without assistance. He wanted to be sure he was off crutches for Eiley's first birthday. He couldn't believe she was turning one; He had started helping her with walking and pronouncing more words, but Viviana was the one to take most of the credit as she could help Eiley more as Christian was still injured.

Vivi was sitting in her bedroom, folding laundry on the bed when Eiley came crawling in. "Eiley Rose! What are you doing?" She smiled.

"Mama, dada?" Eiley stopped, sitting on the floor. Vivi got up and picked her up.

"Dada is leaving for rehab! Getting his leg all better! He wants his leg better before your big day!" Viv smiled, kissing Eiley's cheek. "Did he tell you to come by momma?"

Eiley got squirmy, wanting down from Vivi's arms. Vivi sat her down on her bed. "Dada!" Eiley started crying and Vivi frowned, sitting on the bed and held her close to her.

"Baby girl...He's going to be home later! You can hang with momma!" She rubbed Eiley's back as she sniffled, "It's okay, I promise! No need to cry, okay?" She kissed Eiley's head.

Eiley held her arms out, seeing that her little blanket was on Vivi's bed. "Mama, nuhnuh.." She reached, whining. "Mama!"

Viviana grabbed the blanket and handed it to Eiley who held it in her hands as she sucked her thumb. She sat Eiley back on the bed and fixed her headband. "Buggy, why don't you try and take a nap? Then dada will be home by the time you wake up.."

Eiley was already falling asleep as Vivi talked to her. She just smiled and laid Eiley's head on the pillow before kissing her cheek.

When Christian got home, he walked in their bedroom and smiled. "She okay?"

Vivi nodded, "She came crawling in here once you left and she was sad. She just sat on the floor and asked where you were and I said you were gone getting your leg better and she just started crying." Christian frowned, listening to Vivi.

"Then she wanted her blanket so I gave it to her and sat her down next to me on the bed and she just laid down, sucking her thumb and she was out." She looked over at Eiley, taking the headband off of her. "Think she just needed a nap."

Christian nodded, "Yeah, she was a little cranky when I fed her before I left, but I know she also didn't sleep very well last night."

Vivi sighed, "Yeah, she was up almost every hour. For a little bit, I just sat in the rocking chair in her room and held her because she just wanted to be held. I don't know if it's like the skin to skin contact, or just the thought knowing she's in her mom or dad's arms is what calms her down? But, whatever works is fine with me.." Christian sat down, next to Vivi and leaned over to kiss Eiley's head as she slept.

"I honestly think it's just her wanting to be with us.." Christian said, "Like I could walk into the bathroom or something while she's in her playpen and she just screams 'dada' over and over until I come back. I think it's a security thing.." He shrugged.

"I can't believe she's going to be one soon.." She laid her head on Christian's shoulder.

"It's crazy.. I remember the day when we found out what we were having. I wanted to burst into tears, I wanted a girl so bad."

Vivi smiled and picked her head up, looking at him, "Which honestly surprised me, because I would've thought for sure you would want a boy. Someone to play baseball with." She giggled.

"Just because I got a little girl, doesn't mean I can't play baseball." Christian smiled, "Softball's lame anyways."