Intentional Killer - Book 2 In The Jessie Series

Chapter 21: Peptalks & Problems

× TRAUMA TRAIN. TOOT TOOT, SHUCKFACES ×
🌶️🔥 spicy SHHPPIIISHY kissy scene 🔥🌶️ 🌶️Children you have Ben warned 🌶️

•×•

I sat with the guys for a while, just watching the stars. It was beautiful. The dark inky blue sky and the bright twinkling lights. Minho had got up to help set up camp. It wasn't much backpacks for pillows and granola bars for supper. He had helped heft Winston to his feet and over to the shelter of the fallen walls.

It was just Newt and myself left staring at the sky. I wished Chuck could be here. I shrugged off my backpack and pulled out the teddy bear. I held it in my lap, running a thumb over its fuzzy tummy.

"He'd be proud of you." Newt whispered, nodding to the bear.

"I didn't do a very good job...of getting them out."

"It wasn't all on your buggen' shoulders, Love."

"Then why do I feel so terrible?" I asked quietly, still fidgeting with the bear, I hung my head.

"Because you are putting that pressure on yourself.

"And we left so many kids back in that facility. We just left. And I left Bucky, Newt he was the first brother I ever had. The first person who cared about me and I just left him with...Him! ...and now we're stuck in the Scorch, lost..." I trailed off, looking away.

"No. You share the blame with Tommy and Minho." He chuckled.

"Don't you dare out the two of us together!" I snarled.

Newt sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"I don't care if you have a crush on him. He's an idiot and has no idea how to lead a group. I swear....Newt if he doesn't listen to me in the next high stress, life or death situation I'm going to kill him."

Newt hung his head for a moment.

"I understand, Jess. I do. But he's just doing his bloody best...like the rest of us."

"Well his best killed three of us and almost ended with Winston dead." I snapped.

Newt's shoulders sagged.

"You haven't slept since we escaped the maze, have you?"

"Does drug induced sleep during an unwanted surgery count?"

"No."

"Then hardly. A few hours."

He hummed and was quiet, looking out at the cast stretch of land, the rolling sand hills the diamonds twinkling in the sky.

"I know you're angry...and scared, but-"

"Are you gonna give me some hero pep talk?" I rolled my eyes.

"Yes. Now slim it and listen." He took a steadying breath and collected himself. "Jess...your the reason we're free. You and Tommy. You got us out. You're the leader now. You and Tommy gotta figure out what's going on between you two, but you guys led the group. Those guys would follow you anywhere."

"They would follow you too." I protested.

"Nah, Jess...it's different with you." Newt shook his head with a shrug. "Just look how Tess and Aris follow your bloody instructions, no hesitation. They trust you completely. They look to you as the leader. You always said you were a loan wolf...but I think you're the buggen' pack leader."

"I don't even know where we're going!" I cried. I shook my head, clutching the bear tight in my hands. "Like you said before, I'm trusting an anonymous voice in my head. Who does that?"