Wretched Roses √

Chapter 39-Months

Freya's Pov

(there will be multiple time skips in this chapter)

*panic attack, brief mentions of suicide and trauma*

Several months had gone by since I ended it with Rowan, Leona's sister died and we decided to just be friends. During that time I had started going to therapy and it was helping. I was doing better after I'd cut off all contact with Rowan, my parents, and Kalen. However, trauma didn't just go away like that. How I wish it did.

When it came to Leona, things were complicated. She had her ups and downs but for the most part, she was mostly cooped up in her room, not speaking to anyone. Leona was in a lot of ways doing worse. I had tried to talk about it, but whenever I did, she would shut me out and say she was fine.

She could still barely look at herself without breaking down. I felt helpless. Her parents couldn't afford therapy and Leona certainly didn't have the money for it. Even so, therapy didn't work for everyone. I didn't know how to help her. It hurt seeing her like this.

Today was a bad one for her. It was supposed to be a happy day, we were done with college. Yet, it was anything but. Leona was moving back in with her parents until she could afford an apartment. Meanwhile, I had been living with Wren for a while and was saving up to get my place. She was staying with me for the night, planning on driving back home tomorrow.

Leona was simply staring at the wall, her fingers trembling and leg bouncing up and down. I moved closer, yet refrained from touching her.

"Leona?"

Silence.

"Please talk to me."

And she did. "I'm alone."

I furrowed my eyebrows. "What do you mean?"

"I've graduated and she's not here."

Realization hit me.

"And I have no plans. I just feel so alone," she barely managed to choke out. Her eyes were watery. "Help me, Freya. I can't do this without her."

"It's okay, I'm here. I'm always here."

"I need her, I need her," the last part barely came out as a mumble but I heard it. And it just hurt so badly.

Leona's Pov

I broke out into a sob, bringing my knees to my chest and holding myself for some sort of stability. My legs and hands were quivering and I just couldn't breathe. No matter how much I reached for air it just wouldn't come through. My lungs were tightening and I was almost convinced I was having a heart attack by the pressure expanding on my chest.

My mind was convinced this was it, I was going to die right there and then. Despite only just graduating. It wasn't fair, she was supposed to be right by my side. We were supposed to go through to college together. We were supposed to graduate together. We were supposed to grow up together.

I wanted to scream, scream until my throat ached and my voice faded away. I wanted to scream until the pain went away. Until I was back to the time we used to run around in the backyard chasing each other, back to when we were kids and life was much easier.

"I can't go on like this anymore," I croaked out, shaking my head like the aching would go with it.

"Breathe, Leona. Breathe. It's gonna be fine. Do you hear me? It's gonna be okay, I'm here."