Again. Again. Again. 《 l.s》

♡ SIXTY - EIGHT ♡

guardian angel

NOUN
a spirit or person that watches over and protects another person 
 
•••••
 
Songs 
 
Someone to you - Banners (when you see the ^^^)

•••••• 

[ Harry's POV ]

 "Wanna go to the movies?" Louis asks, pointing to the big city movie theater. The coffee shop we all agreed on is right in the middle of the plaza. So we are now holding hands and walking down the sidewalk. I peek into the shops while Louis sips his coffee. 
 
"I've never been," I admit with a shrug, looking into a pet store window. Waving a little puppy staring back at me. Kiwi will not be happy if I bring home a tiny cocker spaniel So I pull Louis along to the net store. 
 
"Oh boy, we need to make you an actual bucket list honey." He pulls me across the street to a little park. We make ourselves comfy on a rickety bench and he whips out his phone. "What do you wanna do someday?"
 
"I wanna go to the carnival." He nods and types it in his notes. "I wanna go to prom, graduate, go to a party, get a tattoo, have my first..kiss…" I trail off and peek over to see his reaction. He is just typing away. He holds his phone away from his face and frowns. "What's wrong?" I lean over to look but everything looks fine to me.
 
"I've already done half these things." He says quietly. "You haven’t done any of this?" I shake my head and lean away.
 
"I wanna have a boyfriend, I wanna kiss in the rain, I wanna do it, I wanna snog someone in a car, I wanna celebrate new years with all my friends, I wanna have a valentine, I wanna go on a date. Get married. Eat in a restaurant. Go to the library. Go on a picnic. Go to the movies. " I continue to list all the things I wanna do. Shivering as a gust of wind blows. 
 
"You wanna fall in love." Louis states. 
 
"What?" I half-laugh. 
 
"All these things." He looks at me. "You can't do half these things without someone else. You want the cutesy high school love. 
 
"I guess so," I mutter, but I don't. I don't wanna fall in love. Love is too scary, unknown, I'm too afraid I'll mess up if I fall in love. Who would even fall in love with me anyway? 
 
"What do you want?" I ask, squinting from the wind and looking at him. "What type of love?" 
 

•••
 
[ Louis's POV ] 

"What do you want?" He looks over at me with those perfect eyes, on his perfect face, with his perfect hair and his perfect body. "What type of love?
 
What type of love do I want?
 
I want the kind of love that’s “I was scared until I found you.” That kind of love that’s worth it to try romance again. The “Fuck I’ll try cheesy if it just makes you smile.” love. The roses and love notes and wine bottles. The twinkle light love. The “Let’s go on a romantic date only to spend the whole thing being silly.” love. The dancing badly to slow songs love. The “I don’t know how you make me laugh so much but seriously stop it I’m busy” love. the “I trust you,” love. Calling late at night because a secret just welled up in my throat, love. The first person I talk to so I can figure out this decision, kind of love. the “I was hurt before and had given up but then I found you” love, the incredulous in-awe love, the wonder love, the are you actually real or am I making you up love. 
 
The “I didn’t believe in love before you” love. That kinda love. 
 
I want that undeniable kinda love. When their mom asks about me I hope their cheeks turn pink and they have to keep their lips pressed shut because if they open their mouth they’ll tell her how fucking in love they are. The kinda love you wear on all your clothes, even on your skin, and in between strands of hair. The kinda love everybody can see, even when we’re on opposite ends of the room. The kinda love you can hear in my voice and see in pictures. I want my voice to sound like love. I want strangers to speak to me and think “Wow, he’s in love”. 
 
I hope they never bite me off of the tips of their fingernails or rinse me out of their hair. I hope that they never shrug me off or tell their mom we’re only friends. Because I’ve had that kind of love, love that you can brush under the carpet when you need to. I don’t want the kinda love you can ignore. 
 
I want that, in your face, in your mouth, in your hair, in your teeth, on your sleeves kinda love. 
 
And I'm afraid I'm not good enough for the one person I want it from. 
 
"I think I want the same thing." I finally answer. He nods, satisfied."Do you want to go to the movies then? Cross it off your bucket list." He nods again, but then his eyes light up.
 
"Can we try something? It's okay if you say no." He asks, standing up and holding out his hand. 
 
"What is it?" I ask, also standing up.
 
"We could pretend we are dating at the movies." He laces our fingers together gently. Like you would lace a dress together. "Since you said everything on my bucket list is 'cutesy high school romance' it only counts if I do it that way."
 
“Deal.” I smile and we walk in the direction of the theater.