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"If you gather all woman of this world and they shout together, their voice would not override my whisper." ~ Haseki Elmas Sultan
Calista, eldest daughter of a single mother lived her life happily in her little village on a gree...
"Elmas." I heard my name which echoed in my ears over and over again. I felt myself on a bed and in a warm room. I slowly began to open my eyes to see Gevherhan Sultan sitting on the edge of the bed I was laying on and holding my hand.
Her eyes began to shine as she saw me waking up.
"Where am I?" I asked as Gonca came to my left and helped me sit up and lean on the pillow behind me.
"Everything is fine, your in the infirmary room. You've fainted while having a walk." she told me and I started remembering what actually happened and what was the cause of my fainting. I remember the vision of Murad and that princess.
Gonca obviously didn't want to get me in trouble and lied about the reason.
"You scared us all with your sickness." Gevherhan told me as I turned to her. Because of my plans I totally forgot to eat and when I screamed, my body had no energy anymore.
"I forgot to eat Sultanim, that's why I collapsed." I said still having a little headache.
"We will let you rest a bit." Gevherhan patted on my hand and smiled happily which I returned. She and went out with her maids what made me and Gonca be alone in the infirmary.
I moved my legs on the ground slowly and stood up trying to catch my balance.
"What are you doing? You have to rest." Gonca said worriedly as I put my hand around her shoulder.
"I don't need to rest. I want to see my children." she sighed in annoyance and helped me walk to my chambers.
I saw Turhan sitting on the couch while Yasmin made her hair. As both saw me walking in with a limp, they came towards me.
"Validam? Are you fine?" Turhan worried and I sat down on my bed. I smiled softly at her and put my hand in her cheek rubbing it as she sat next to me.
"I am fine my beautiful daughter. I just need to eat something." she nodded still being worried.
"Yasmin bring me Bayezid and Mustafa." she nodded and was about to go as Bayezid came running to me by his own. I picked him up and sat him on the other side of the bed and Nilufer gave me my a one year old son in my arms.
"Tell the maids to prepare the dinner." both Yasmin and Gonca left me with my children alone while Nilufer walked to the other room.
"Is everything fine? You look sad." Bayezid asked.
"It's nothing, I just wanted to spend some time with you." I lied to them as my maids began to prepare the table and bring the dinner. Soon we all sat down and began eating peacefully. The only thing that kept me alive after finding out about the princess was them. Only god knows what I would have done to myself if I hadn't had them.
~
"Destur!" I heard and was sure it was Murad. I stood up from the couch with Mustafa in my arms as the doors opened and like I assumed Murad came in. He smiled as soon as he saw me while I tried to stay calm. How could he look at me like nothing happened?
"Elmas'm, Mustafa'm" he walked closer taking Mustafa from me as Turhan and Bayezid came also running.
"Father!" both shouted hugging him and he kissing their foreheads.
"Turhan, Bayezid how are you?" he sat on the couch with them besides him.
"Now that we saw you, we've got better." Turhan made her father smile.
"When will we go horse riding again?" Bayezid asked his father who gave Mustafa to Nilüfer.
"Soon my lion." he kissed his head one last time and signaled Nilüfer to take the kids back inside, but I stopped her.
"Take them to their aunt Gevherhan, they wanted to see her and Selim." Nilüfer nodded and left my chambers with the kids. I was sure Murad and I were going to have an argument and I didn't want them to hear.
I turned back to Murad who showed me to sit next to him what I did.
"Gevherhan told me about you sickness. I hope it's nothing serious." he told me and kissed my hand what I returned with a fake smile. Every time I looked at him, I saw a backstabber.
"I just needed to rest a bit, nothing else." he nodded.
"I wanted to visit you the whole week, but you weren't in the palace. Where have you been?" I played dumb.
"I had some state affairs to do in the city." he lied into my face not knowing that I already know everything. I looked down at his hands on mine.
"Murad tell me the truth. Silahtar Paşa and Mehmed Paşa both were in the palace and you don't visit the city without them being with you." I hold my tears back even if they were about to stream out.
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Murad took his hands back and stood up turning his back to me.
"Were you with a woman?" my voice cracked at the end and a single tear dropped from my eye.
"I don't have to explain myself to you Elmas, I can go where and when I want." I wiped my tear away standing up and walking in front of him.
"Yes you don't have to, but lying to me is also not necessary! You could have told me the truth right away." I yelled at him. He got angrier what I saw at the first sign.
"Would you have accepted me being with another woman?" he asked trying not to yell at me. I gave him the biggest glance.
"Of course not Murad! What would you do if you see me with another man?!" I couldn't control myself and let out my anger.
"Behave yourself Elmas. I am not ordinary man you are talking to. I am the Sultan and even if I love you, I won't accept this behavior a second time." he went to the door ready to open it as I stopped him.
"I am also not an ordinary woman Murad. My name is Elmas and I am not like any other woman you know." I got closer to him looking him directly in the eyes.
"You can't just play with me and then throw me away like you did with Ayşe. I won't allow it!" anger filled his and my eyes. I thought he would leave my chamber by now, but he didn't. Instead he crashed his lips to mine full of lust and anger.
I couldn't allow myself to forgive him. I couldn't, but still did. I kissed him back what lead to us laying on the bed naked.
