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"If you gather all woman of this world and they shout together, their voice would not override my whisper." ~ Haseki Elmas Sultan
Calista, eldest daughter of a single mother lived her life happily in her little village on a gree...
"AHHHH, WHERE ARE THE MIDWIVES!" I screamed in pain as I laid on my bed.
"Elmas please calm down they are on their way." Gonca put a wet cloth on my forehead, so I could calm down.
The time has come and I was giving brith. God alone knows what pain I went through while giving birth. Finally the doors opened and midwives came in.
"Press her belly as a help." one midwife ordered to a nurse. She came and put both of her hands on my stomach and pressed it.
"Push Hatun!" I heard what got really on my nerves. Didn't she see that I was already pushing with my whole strength.
"I AM ALREADY PUSHING AHHHH!" I shouted and everyone could hear the anger in my voice.
The labor took two whole hours. This were the most painful hours in my whole life. I pushed for the last time and finally heard a baby's crying. They pain was that strong that I fainted right after giving birth.
The last thing I heard were the doors which opened and then everything went black.
~
I opened my eyes and saw Yasmin and Gonca sitting on the couch in my room. As soon as they saw me, they walked to me.
"Elmas! Thanks god you opened your eyes." Gonca said in relief.
I tried to get up, but everything still hurt. Yasmin helped me and prepared my pillow, so I could sit comfortable.
"My baby. Where is my baby?" I asked as I remembered the painful birth.
"Don't worry, the baby is healthy Alhamdulallah. We all were afraid for you." Yasmin told me and in that moment my doors opened. Lalezar Kalfa walked in with a baby in her arms who was in a white blanket.
"My baby." she handed me my child for the first time. It was the best feeling in the whole world.
"My little Şehzade." I said and everyone in the room exchanged looks.
"Mashallah you gave birth to beautiful and healthy Sultana." Lalezar's words made me freeze. I looked at Gonca and Yasmin and they nodded in agreement.
"No... that's not possible." tears began to collect in my eyes as the doors opened again. Murad and all of his female family members walked in, what made everyone in the room bow. Ayşe also came and I saw the huge grin on her face.
"Congratulations Elmas. Our Sultana is the beauty her self." Kösem Sultan congratulated me as Murad took my daughter out of my hands. I was sure she felt relieved that I didn't give birth to a Şehzade. Just as Ayşe.
Lalezar gave me a headscarf for the name ceremony. I would have been a lot happier if my baby was a boy.
Murad began to say the Azan in the baby's ears.
"Turhan, your name will be Turhan." Murad repeated three times. All the time Murad didn't even bother to look at me.
"Wait outside and leave me with Elmas alone." everyone except for Kösem bowed to Murad and walked out.
"Are you angry at me?" I asked shyly as Murad handed me Turhan.
"We will talk later, rest now. The birth exhausted you." he still didn't look at me and walked out. I was sure that he was disappointed. But what could I do? I couldn't control the gender and seeing him like this made me sad.
"Give her to me." Kösem Sultan took Turhan from my arms and kissed her cheeks. She gave her maids a look and they opened a big box with dresses in it. I actually would have been happy, but Murad's disappointment made me angry and sad at the same time.
"These are my gifts for you. You also will get new maids who will help you with Turhan." she gave my daughter to Gevherhan Sultan and walked out followed by Atike and Ayşe.
Gevherhan Sultan sat down at the edge of my bed with Turhan in her arms.
"Turhan looks exactly like Murad." Gevherhan started a conversation, but I didn't pay attention.
"Elmas." she brought me back to reality.
My head snatched to her and she gave me a glance.
"I know that you and Murad expected a boy, but this was Allah's will. I am sure everything will turn back to the good." she smiled and gave me Turhan.
"I will leave you two alone. You surely want to have some time with your daughter." Gevherhan left my chamber. I looked at the baby in my arms who fell asleep and I sighed.
"Take her and bring her to her crib." I ordered Yasmin who went with the new born to the small room where my child would be sleeping in.
"Are you really that sad about your daughter?" Lalezar asked with a sad voice.
"What do you want me to say? That I didn't wanted a prince?" I scoffed and got under my blanket, because everyone and everything annoyed me at that moment.
"Of course not, but-" I interrupted her.
"Leave me alone. You and Gonca can return to the Harem." I heard them sighing and the sound of the door.
I don't know how long it took me to cry myself to sleep, but I am sure it was long.
~
"Shhhhhhh" Yasmin whispered not wanting to annoy me.
Since the early morning Turhan didn't stop crying while Yasmin walked with her in her arms around the room.
I shut the book which I was reading and stood up from my bed.
"Give her to me." Yasmin gave me Turhan as I signaled her to go back to the other room.
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As soon as Turhan got in my arms she stopped crying. A little smile was formed on her face, what made me chuckle.
"My little Sultana..." I started as I sat with the baby in my arms on the couch.
"I am sorry that I didn't pay attention to you. You and your father are everything I have left in this cold world and as your father had this disappointed look on his face, I got angry. But I never hated you nor will I ever." I kissed her little cheeks and hold her tight.
