Chapter 91 - Magical Memories

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 "I seduced him into a corner and hit him over the head with a cricket bat."

Dead silence.

She wasn't sure who had the best reaction - Clara, who looked taken aback; the Ranger, who had betrayal warring with disbelief in his wide eyes; or the Doctor, who simply lowered his drink after taking a healthy gulp, beamed at her with a wide, toothy grin, and patted her twice on the shoulder.

"Nice work, fairy-girl!" he told her enthusiastically. "Let me tell you, I was really worried when my sonic picked up another receiver out there. I couldn't leave my spot, and I had no way to warn you, but I knew you could handle it, and I was right!" he said proudly, not noticing how hard she was struggling to keep a straight face. 

She'd seen this before.

"You were positively brilliant!" he exclaimed, placing one hand on her cheek and kissing her soundly on the forehead in praise before turning towards the TARDIS. "Now let's get back to the TARDIS so we can look at Clara's ankle," he called over his shoulder. "No need to make her wait any longer than she has to, I can treat it right there."

Clara and the Ranger turned to her, both trying to stammer something out, but she held up a hand to stop them, mischief glimmering in her eyes. "Play along," she mouthed, winking at them and mentally counting down in her head as she watched the Doctor lift the cup to his mouth for another drink and suddenly freeze halfway through.

As it turned out, the Doctor won for best reaction, no contest, because the next second he choked violently on his drink, dropping the cup and spraying punch everywhere. Coughing into his hand and wheezing for air, Lyssa hurried over and guiltily patted him on the back in an effort to help him breathe again, ignoring the stares coming from others. He straightened and turned to her as soon as he could draw enough air to breath again. 

"I'm sorry, could you repeat that?" he asked in a raspy voice, eyes wide and face bright red from almost choking.

She blinked up at him, eyes as wide and innocent as she could make them. "I pulled him away from the Emperor and distracted him with a chat. Are you all right? That was a nasty cough you had."

The Ranger suddenly made a strangled sound, leaning over to Clara and whispering in her ear. She clasped her hands to her mouth as her eyes went wide, staring at Lyssa in disbelief before a wide grin spread across her face as she tried to muffle her giggles into her hands without much success. 

"I'm fine," he waved the question off, staring at her with scrunched brows and a frown on his face. "But that's not what you said. You said -"

"Doctor, I promise you, that's exactly what I did," she interrupted him with a frown, feigning confusion. "I pulled him away from the Emperor and distracted him with a chat to keep him from noticing the time. And then Clara and the Ranger broke the machines and he was revealed as having a weapon, so the guards caught him."

"I mean, yeah, but that's not what you said!" he repeated, his hands starting to wave about wildly in the air the way they always did when he was flustered. 

"Doctor, what are you talking about?" the Ranger asked, staring at him with concern. "She said she distracted him with a chat, we all heard her say that. Didn't you, Clar?" he asked, turning to the still-struggling brunette at his side.

She froze for a moment, then took a deep breath and forcibly calmed herself, nodding vigorously. "Oh yeah, that's exactly what she said. Are you sure you didn't mishear her, Doctor?" she questioned. "It is a bit noisy in here, what with the ships leaving and all."

"No, no, before all that!" the poor Doctor insisted, still staring at her. "You're trying to distract me, or, or, or, you didn't hear it or something, but I'm a Time Lord, Lyssa, I've got superior hearing and an excellent memory," he reminded her, pointing to his ears with a serious expression. 

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