she's like any other person i met,
yet she's so different from anyone else.
why am i sad with this feeling i get?
if i'm alone or lonely, it doesn't change.
never in my life experienced this,
now this pressure consumed me.
she's the only one i'm gonna miss
until her figure in front of me i see,
until i can finally wrap my arms
around her shoulders and hold her.
so in the night when i watch the stars,
i'm traveling through the city back there.
the smell of her secret follows
with every single breath i take.
don't know where this train goes
but still managed asleep or awake.
pressing my lips on the electric cigarette
you gave me to protect.
i know some day you will forget
about the struggles i attract.
dreaming about your lips
and fantasy of beating heart.
that is still longing for one kiss,
for a hug and possibly its own guard.
i'm longing for your embrace,
i told you i didn't want to let go.
you won't like me by any chance
like i liked you only a month ago.
i don't mind being trapped in this cage
if you stay by my side with no feelings.
it was a hard time to let go and turn the page,
to forgive myself, to leave and pack all my things.
i'd repeat myself... but i still like you
more than anything in this world,
even now i break my own rule
not to paint the mind in gold.
the way you look at me and start to laugh
turns sadness into garden of eden.
there's no way, i swear to god,
white can light up the blackened.
so how can she give me life
if my mind was already lost and forgotten?
how can she hide my knife
which made this person threatened.
i've never seen happiness,
now it's sitting next to my bag,
minding her own business,
since it's just me she could get.
as soon as i get her whole attention,
she shows me her poetry with a smile.
i started questioning the meaning of creation,
though not minding running metre or mile.
here's a medicine awaiting the silence,
in which i find new home.
her blonde hair even from distance
makes me forget i'm here alone.
"what did you find in me? still wondering."
i could go for hours just to answer.
how can i finish all my poetry
if in my head is her, a foreign dancer?
bought a pack of cigarettes camel.
"thanks to you, i don't hate the smoke."
so i said it's only about the price and label
and i'll end up being broke.
every time she praises my actions,
my heart is beating faster.
on the way back i saw her reflection,
i couldn't help but made a gesture.
i took her hand, again, it started.
told her: "now i feel something".
and before i realised it,
she called me "romantic".
then hug or two on the way
to the place, waiting for the car.
we stood there, calling it a day,
she left, i watched her from afar.
i missed her ever since,
i was lying to myself and granny
that it's only some fly, no tears.
the truth? existence is sometimes too heavy.
