That Imperfect Addiction

-2-

Felicity

I got dressed in a casual boho dress for the dinner. Trust me, all I wanted to do was to curl up in a warm blanket with a bucket full of ice cream and watch a marathon of Friends.
Alas! Here I am. Getting ready for the dinner, like every Saturday.

You may think why am I even going to that person's house. I don't wanna go either but for my mother, I've to do it.

My mother owns a small flower shop. Being a single mother, owning merely a small flower shop that too in a small town, was not enough. She did her best while raising me up. Mum was an orphan so there's no chance of having grandparents to support us.

We somehow made it till my middle school but studies after that were costing my mother a fortune. She was barely keeping up with all the loads. That's when she made the decision. A decision that changed my life for good and for worse.

She asked my, so called, father for help. He came to visit us. At first I was sure he was going to say no but I don't know what make him change his mind. So he decided to take me in, legally.

Within two days all paper works were finished and I was moved away from my mother and my humble Town to this big greedy City. Everything changed. People, life, priorities- everything.

But not once did I said anything. I knew how hard it was for my mother to cope up with everything. I know my mother well. She's a woman with high self-esteem, so it must've not been easy for her to ask my father for help. So I only focused on my studies and molded myself to be the daughter my father always wanted. The perfect obedient daughter. Top in classes with high grades, participation in other curricular activities, etc., I always did as I was told.

Rachel Miller, my stepmother, is not a kind or nice woman and she hated the fact that I'm her husband's illegitimate child. But she never went to physical abuse. Just some awful comments here and there about me being a small town girl, that's it. No crossing the boundary.

Lucy Miller, my stepsister, is a bitch just like her mother but sometimes can be a tolerable person, depending on her mood. She can be sweet, a little too much sweet, that it annoy the hell out of you.

My father, Matt Miller, never showed an ounce of emotion to me. He brought gifts for Lucy on every Christmas and birthdays but my gift was nothing compared to her. I used to receive some used up dolls of Lucy's, neither I expected any good gifts nor did I ever wanted them.

I, too, made sure never to show any emotion in front of them. No matter how long I stay awake at night, crying my heart out, I kept my straight face for them with a polite behaviour.

As soon as I got the job for an editor post, I moved out of that awful house and ranted my own apartment. Matt, my father, made it sure to make a rule for family dinner every Saturday. Mother feels like she's in debt of my father for taking care of me, so she make me go to that hellhole every Saturday.

So here I was, standing in front of the mirror, applying some makeup to look less zombie like. I slightly curled up my hair and tried to look as presentable as I could. I don't think I want to hear another comment out of that woman's mouth, clearly today is not my day.

Checking everything for the last time, I called an uber. As soon as the car arrived, I walked out of my apartment room and locked the door. Taking a step ahead towards the elevator, I stumbled a little.

'Damn you heels!'

With cautious steps, I reached downstairs and sat inside the car. I looked at the night lights across the streets and noticed how busy everyone was, even at this hour. Unintentionally, my thoughts again drifted to him. No matter how many times I stop myself, I found myself thinking about him every second minute.

How he commanded everyone, how he firmly hold my hand, how he warned me, let me go so easily. But something inside my gut said it was not over. And that feeling was unnerving.

You know, it's that kind of feeling where you know something's gonna happen but what, you have no idea. Where your gut warns you to be cautious but about what? You don't know. You just wait for the storm; just enjoying the silence before it.

"Miss, we're here" the driver called, dragging me out of my thoughts.

"Oh. Thank you for the ride" i said while paying him and got out of the car.

The big mansion before me stood in his all fame and light. I can't bring myself to think that it is beautiful because for last few years it was nothing to me but served only as a prison.

Taking a deep breath I walked in. Door was opened by one of the maid. She smiled at me, which I warmly returned.

"Dinner is about to serve Miss. Please take a seat on the dinning table" I nodded and followed her.

On the table, they were already seated. As soon as Rachel saw me, she ran her calculative gaze on me from head to toe. Thankfully, she didn't said anything.

"Good evening" I politely greeted everyone in general, while taking my seat. I kept my gaze on food as it was my second beloved thing on earth beside my mum.

I felt my father gaze on my side head but ignoring it, I start eating my food. First, I want this whole stupid thing to get over as soon as possible. And second, the food was too tasty to be ignored.

"No surprise you're gaining so much weight, Felicity. Just hold your horses and eat slow" Lucy said while giggling lightly.

'here we go!'