Sackett Towers
2:12 pm
The team broke into an apartment.
"NYPD, hands where I can see them" Jake yelled to a strange old man with a flute in his hand.
"Don't shoot! I was just practicing my minuets, but I'll hold it down" the strange man said.
"All right, flute man, who else is in this apartment? Where's the dealer?".
"I live here alone with my birds".
"What, you don't think I know this m.o.?
These are mules.
They're drug mules.
They're bird mule drugs.
Drug bird mules" Jake tried to say.
"Apartment's clear" Boyle said.
"We got multiple calls about a dealer here".
"I bet it's the silly kids down the hall. They love prank calling me. The only drugs in this apartment are for my heart, my liver, my kidney, my salivary glands, and my penis and my feet".
"Oh, bird pooped on your shoulder.
No, wait... pooped on your head, then dripped
onto your shoulder" Charles stated, touching Jake's head.
_____________________________
99th Precinct
11:22 am
"I'm telling you, it's good luck" Boyle tried to comfort Jake.
"No, it isn't, okay? That's just something people say when a bird poops on you to make you feel better because it's terrible".
"Did a bird shit on you? Why am I missing out on the best things?" Y/n muttered.
"Fore, comin' in!" Hitchcock yelled.
"Oh, come on" Jake commented.
"I was at the crime scene. This guy comes up
out of nowhere, confesses. Well, he says he's gotta make things right, so helps me track down his accomplices" Hitchcock affirmed.
"How the hell is this possible? Did fortune spit in my face when I was born?" Y/n added.
"That is so great, man. Looks like everything's
comin' up Hitchcock" Jake mumbled.
_____________________________
"Hey, jake. You busy?" Gina asked Jake, walking into the bathroom while he was pissing.
"Yes, I very clearly am busy".
"The medical examiner's office just called. so the d.a.'s gonna have to dismiss your last two busts" she announced.
Jake signed, "great. And the slump gets worse".
"I don't think it's a slump. Honestly, you are straight-up cursed".
"Good to know" Jake remarked.
Trying to flush the urinal, a pipe broke and the water hit him in the face.
"Can you hand me a paper towel, please, Gina?"
"There's no more left".
"Yeah, that sounds right."
_____________________________
"Hey" Jake greeted, walking wet and dripping into Holt's office.
"You're dripping on my carpet".
"Oh, don't worry, sir. It's just urinal water.
Clean urinal water".
"You could eat off his shirt" Charles observed.
"Why would I ever eat off his shirt?".
"Look, sir, I don't know what's going on, but I think I'm cursed".
"Cursed, huh?".
"The freakiest things have been happening to me. I mean, I can't solve a case to save my life. I had a fight with Y/n, this hasn't happened to me since we started working together and it just happened today.
Birds are unloading on me left and right, and two seconds ago-".
YOU ARE READING
Only best friends? | Jake Peralta x reader
FanfictionJake and Y/n are inseparable best friends, they work at Brooklyn's 99th Precinct and are the best detectives. Will they become more than best friends or they will remain just that? (if there are any typos let me know) :)
