Beyond Her Exterior

Chapter 3: Clumsy

I stood in the mirror of the bathroom staring at my reflection. I was an utter mess, there was no doubt about that. I moved my hair to one side of my shoulder and ran my fingers down my neck. You could literally see the bruises forming on my neck. I winced as I pressed down on it gently. It hurt, like a bitch. I dropped my hand as I observed my right cheek. There was a bruise there, it was all yellow and purple but still noticable. I can't keep living like this. How long am I willing to put up this fight before I crash and burn?

I think I'm so strong but really I'm fragile. I won't be able to take this much longer like I think I will. It's only Mid-October here in California and I've got to the point where I don't even know if I'll make it to the new year.

I put on fake smiles so nobody could see past my façade and realize what a mess I really was.

But the real question is, how much longer can I go smiling like I'm fine, as if my life is perfect before someone realizes it's all fake. Before they realize I'm living miserably.

Everyone at school think's I'm some Princess that must live in a mansion. That I must live the perfect life with the perfect parents and that must be why I'm so happy all the time.

Little did they know though....

They didn't notice I was trapped in a life that I shouldn't be.

Sometimes I wonder if life is actually worth living.

"Get the fuck out!" I heard his voice shout as he pounds on the bathroom door.

"This is my bathroom, use your own if you want to shoot yourself up you lowlife!" I shout back.

He continued on banging on the bathroom door, but I refused to leave and let him in here so he can put that damn needle in his arm. I sunk my body onto the floor and brought my knees up to my chest as I wrapped my arms around myself. I guess I'm gonna be late to school today.

"Open the fucking door before I knock it down myself!" He screams.

I shiver, everytime his voice is loud like that I become nervous. I moved further away from the door and pressed my back up against the shower. "Go away." I whispered shutting my eyes. "Just go away."

"That's fucking it!" My Step-Father shouts once again.

I thought he was going to leave, but instead I heard something slam into the door and a cracking noise. Did he just punch the door with his fist? What the fuck is he the Hulk or something? I stood up quickly and my body trembled. If he get's in here then he's gonna beat me.

I hear a cracking noise in the door again and I feel myself start panic. My heart started racing so I clutched my stomach. The door flung open seconds after and I started crying. He stepped in and grabbed me by my hair and literally threw me out of the bathroom.

I banged my head against the wall and layed there for a second before getting up. I glanced into my bathroom and watched him stick the needle into his arm. "You keep fucking watching me like that and I'll fucking stick this in you." He warned as he turned toward me.

"I-I'm sorry." I stuttered, backing away from him some more. I didn't want him anywhere near me. 

"Get out of my house." He growls.

"I-I need to get ready for school." I said wiping away a few tears from my eyes. I have yet to cover the nail marks on my neck and the bruise on my right cheek.

"Does it look like I fucking care? You're wearing clothes! So go!" He said as he threw a hairbrush at me, it hit me in the stomach. It didn't hurt though, I'm used to much worse.