𝐈𝐧 𝐌𝐲 𝐒𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐝𝐞 (𝒈𝒙𝒈)

𝐗𝐗𝐗 𝐇𝐨𝐦𝐞

𝐄𝐦𝐦𝐚

I don't understand. I'm sure I did something wrong, for her to just ignore me like that. Oh gosh- was I being too dramatic? Should I have not said anything? And why did she hurt herself? Was it because of me?

Even though she said I didn't do anything, I still wonder- who made her that way? Who broke her?

Drea dropped me off at our house. There was still this lingering distance between us... subtle, but I can feel it. Now standing on the front of our house, dread started to fill my heart. I did not want to face her. Slowly walking towards the door, I opened it.

"I'm home." I let out softly.

"Emma? Is that you?" I can hear my mother's voice call through the kitchen.

"Yes mom, I'm back." I went to the kitchen and there she was, my loving mother preparing our dinner. I go up to her and start chopping some vegetables. Growing up, she never favoured between us. She showed equal love and compassion. Although I am closer to mom than Anna, she's closer to dad. Mom has a green thumb, so I definitely got that from her.

"Welcome back, Emma. The house has been lonely without you nor your sister." She smiled sadly.

"Has she not return yet?" I ask.

"Well, she does come home every now and then. And she still helps around the house but after feeding your bunnies she goes straight to her friend's house. It's like she's moved out. Your father thinks it's a good way for her to be independent, but I don't think so."

My heart shrinks some more. I miss my sister. I miss my other half. I miss my best friend. I want to make things right. But how can I? It's not like I can flunk every test and assignments purposely. I wouldn't want that, it's how I got new friends. What if they leave me? I also have been enjoying putting more effort in my studies. But if it means losing my only sister...

No. It's better if we talk it out.

The sound of plates hitting the table woke me up from my trance.

"Are you okay hun? You've been quiet for a while now. A penny for your thoughts?"
I giggle at mom's idiomatic expression.

"I just thought about making things right." I shrugged my shoulders. Feeling the weight of guilt making it hard to do so.

"Oh honey..." My mom comes to hug me ever so gently.

"You have nothing to make right. You did nothing wrong, your sister just isn't used to it, is all. Just give her time." She lovingly spoke.

Maybe she's right. But I fear that my sister is growing apart from me. I feel tears trickle my eyes, so I just nod at mom, and went upstairs. In my room. In our room. Suddenly tears start flowing down my cheeks. The weight is too much. I fell down to my knees, memories with Anna came flooding, like a movie trailer. I just want to feel okay. For a second, the thought of Drea and her starry eyes crosses my mind. But I quickly dismiss it. I don't want to cause any more trouble.

So instead, I just did what I do best.

...

After a few hours, I was still sniffling a bit. But at least with a calmer mind set.

"One, two, three, four..." I mumble, counting all of my books to keep track. Once again, they were laid on the floor, color-coded. But this time, I made a small shelf on the outside of my bookshelf, specifically to store the books Drea gave me. During the night I was a mess in front of her, we talked about books. Obviously. And she gave me three of the many books displayed on the living room of the villa. But they weren't novels, no. They were classic literature. The ones her parents gifted her when she was a child. It was a whole collection, ranging from Shakespeare, Jane Austin, to Emily Dickinson. Drea said she read most of them, but never bothered to bring them home. So she gave some to me. And my oh my did she insist.

Anyways, those books are now neatly displayed right by my work table alphabetically. Now then, let's get on with the others. After some while I decided to arrange them by the authors, and as you guessed it, alphabetically. Honestly, most of these books are reprints. I only had few original ones, including the books Drea gave me. Partially because I wanted to save money but mostly because I didn't have enough to buy the originals. It's okay though, besides the quality, they are both the same. Once I finished, I stepped back to admire the arrangement.

But as I looked around, I noticed the dust slowly pilling up on the desk. So, I went downstairs and picked up my handy dandy cleaning supplies. I got to work and started on vacuuming the floor. As I vacuumed around a bit, I took notice of the empty bed beside me. How little the presence of her I felt. I want to fix this. I'm tired of running. Actually, I'm quite tired of vacuuming so after tidying up just a bit more, I collapsed into the soft, bitter sweet feeling of exhaustion.

𝐀/𝐍: okay I actually owe an apology... This chapter has been on my draft nearly two months now but in all honesty, I forget about it lmao. Hello to all my new readers!! Just to keep track, we're on chapter 30 now!! Yeyy
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-B :)