Indifference (boyxboy)

5. My Biggest Rival

Elijah

It was another bad day. I could tell as soon as I saw her.

She was sitting on the sofa, staring straight ahead, a glazed expression on her face.

"Mum, why aren't you in bed?"

She remained still for a couple of seconds and then turned my way in surprise, like it had taken a moment for the message to get from her ears to her brain.

"Oh, is it morning?" she asked. "I couldn't sleep."

She was sitting in her dressing gown with what looked like a cold cup of tea held in her lap.

"Do you want some breakfast?" I asked.

"No, I think I'll just go back to bed and try to get some sleep."

"Good idea," I said as I watched her pull herself up and shuffle off towards the stairs.

I let out a sigh as I reached for the bread and put a couple of slices into the toaster. I hoped it was just going to be a day, but last time I found her like this it was well over a week until she was up and about again.

My mum suffered from depression, and had done for as long as I could remember. She could function alright most of the time, but there were days, sometimes weeks where she just......well she just didn't. She would do nothing but sleep or stare into space. During these times, I just had to remind myself that she would come back to me eventually. She always did. But that didn't seem to stop the anxiety settling in. What if it was more than a week this time? What if it was a month, or more? Or what if she had to go into hospital again?

She had only been taken into hospital once that I knew of, and that was when I was 4 so my memory of it was a little sketchy. I had to stay with a woman in the next town over. I couldn't even remember her name, but I remembered she had a massive dog, and I was so scared of it that I spent most of my time there shut in my room.

I finished making my toast and smothered it with jam and butter. While I ate, I tidied up the kitchen, and then as soon as the toast was eaten, I washed up the plate, dried it and put it back in the cupboard then wiped down the counter, making sure there were no toast crumbs anywhere.

I went upstairs and gave my mum a kiss goodbye, before heading off to school.

I lived about 5 miles from our school, which meant that unless I set off ridiculously early, I couldn't walk. That gave me two options. The first was taking the school bus, but considering I'd rather pull my own teeth out, that only left me with one other option. Getting a lift from my neighbour, Mrs Crompton, who happened to be Alicia's mother, which meant that I was also riding in a car with Alicia.

Alicia was my biggest rival. I prided myself on being the best at most things (sport excluded of course) and Alicia was my greatest barrier in achieving my aim. We were equally matched in terms of intelligence, only whereas she was slightly better at English and the Arts, I was slightly better at Maths and the Sciences. But the one area where she always excelled above me was music. And it grated on me like nails down a chalk board.

You see, I'd always loved music and began learning the violin from a young age. But even though my intelligence and love of practicing had led me to excel for my age, Alicia had a natural gift which made her untouchable. It was like she breathed music. She had perfect pitch and was an excellent pianist winning several national competitions (which she often liked to remind me).

Mrs Crompton and Alica were already in the car waiting when I got outside. I slid onto the back seat, greeting Mrs Crompton as I always did. Alicia said nothing, and I liked it that way.