Indifference (boyxboy)

2. My F**cking Tie

Ryan

"Mum!" I shouted, "Where's my tie?"

I grabbed hold of my bed, which was just a mattress on the floor, and tipped it over looking for my damn school tie.

"Fuck dude!" Nate said as my pillow and duvet slid off onto his bed, or mattress on the floor.

"I can't find my fucking tie!" I offered as an explanation, my body getting more and more tense as I felt the frustration start to build.

"MUM!" I screamed.

"WHAT?!!" came back the equally frustrated response.

"DO YOU KNOW WHERE MY TIE IS?"

"BUSTER HAD ONE IN HIS MOUTH EARLIER."

Buster was a dog. Not our dog. It was our neighbour's dog but for some reason it seemed to spend more time in our house than it's own.

"FUCK!! MUM!!! I'm already on my third warning!" I shouted as I headed out of my room and thundered down the stairs.

"Well you should look after you things better," my mum said with a shrug as she walked through from the kitchen into the lounge.

"Well maybe if I had a cupboard to put things in, I'd be able to," I shot back.

"Shut your mouth Ryan," my dad said, clipping the back of my head as he walked past. "Don't talk to your mum like that. You need to show some respect."

"Do I?" I said, feeling my frustration reach boiling point, "Because all I can see is someone who-

"Watch your fucking mouth," my dad growled cutting me off. I could see in his eyes that I was moving ever closer to a beating so I clamped my mouth shut.

I grabbed my bag off the floor in the hallway and slammed the door as hard as I could as I left.

I fucking hated my family at times.

My dad was your typical benefit cheat. He claimed to have damaged his back while working as a bricky when he was in his 20's. His 'ailment' seemed to go through a surprising 6 month cycle, where for 5 months he was perfectly fine, then for the one month where he had to go for his medical, it suddenly flared up and he could barely walk.

It's not like he did nothing when he was 'having a good day'. He worked cash in hand for his cousin Billy who had his own company doing landscaping.

In theory, with benefits and his extra cash we should have been fine. Not flush, but not skint either. But unfortunately my dad liked to gamble. On pretty much anything as well.

My mum wasn't much better. My mum had never worked since she married. But to be fair, that wasn't her fault. My dad wouldn't let her work. "No wife of mine will be seen working for some bastard who thinks he's better than everyone else."

It wouldn't bother me if that meant my mum actually did things around the house. But she rarely cooked other than throwing frozen things in the oven, and the house was always a mess.

If there was one thing my parents had taught me, it was that I never wanted to grow up to be like them.

Despite my reputation, I actually wasn't doing too badly at school. Sure, I wasn't great at some subjects, like English and History, but I was good at Maths and the Sciences. And they were the important ones I needed if I wanted to become an electrician.

Ok, so maybe I needed at least a C in English, but I could always resit next year if I needed to.

By the time I got to school my rage had somewhat simmered down, but I knew it wouldn't take much to spark me back off again.

I headed straight for the back of the sheds where they kept the sports equipment, then reached for the inside pocket of my jacket to pull out a smoke.

I nodded at Freddie and Jonas as I lit up.

Freddie and Jonus were kind of my friends, but not really. We'd sort of somehow ended up together without consciously making the decision to. I guess out of everyone in school, I identified with them the most.

Freddie lived with just his older brother who basically didn't give a shit, and Jonas, well no one knew what went on in Jonas' life, but whatever it was, it was dark. I recognised Jonas from the underground bare knuckle fighting club that I attended, and apparently that was enough for us to hang out together.

Both Freddie and Jonas were assholes, but they served a purpose so I just put up with them.

"Did you see Eddie last night?" Jonas asked.

Eddie was my cousin, and the one person I truly considered my friend. He didn't go to the same school as me though. He lived in the traveller park on the other side of town.

"No, why?" I asked, inhaling deeply before blowing the smoke back out into the air.

"Apparently the police raided The Rankin Arms last night."

"Really?" I said, raising my eyebrows. Eddie's brother worked at the Rankin Arms. Everyone knew it was basically a glorified drug den.

"Yeah, I don't know if they found anything though," Jonus replied.

"They'd have to be blind not to find anything," I commented.

"Yeah, but last time they were tipped off," Freddie added, "maybe they were again."

I shrugged.

The 5 minute warning bell rang so I put out my cigarette and headed inside to get my books out of my locker.

By the time I was heading to my first lesson of the day, I could see that Jonus and Freddie had Franz pinned up against his locker.

Jonas and Freddie seemed to like to take their frustrations out on the misfits of the school, often shoving them around and snatching their lunch, shit like that. They'd only ever got really physical a couple of times that I knew of. And that was usually because they were provoked.

Freddie turned to see me waiting to head to class so he picked up Franz by the front of his blazer and threw him across the corridor, sending his glasses and books flying. I stepped over the mess and headed to class.

"Touch that, and I'll kill you," I heard Freddie growl out to someone.

I glanced back in curiosity to see Elijah knelt on the floor, his hand frozen a couple of inches from Franz's glasses.

I could almost see the internal battle playing itself across Elijah's face.

"Come the fuck on!" I shouted to Freddie, "We're going to be late!"

Freddie gave one last snapping growl at Elijah, making him flinch back, before making his way over and joining me as we headed to class.

"I'm going to make that dweeb pay!" Freddie grumbled.

I sighed.

I wasn't sure why they wasted their energy.