Stay- Han Jisung x Reader ✔️

XVII

It was after the fan sign and Jisung had kept the box of letters under the table so the staff couldn't take it away. His mood was ruined when he found out Eunjin was gone, but he had to fake a smile for the fans, for the camera.

—

Jisung had returned to the dorm with his members and immediately went to his room and started crying his heart out. Not long after, Hyunjin came in and cried with him.

"Why are you two crying?" Their leader, Chan, had walked in.

"I-I found o-out my s-sister h-has p-p-passed." Hyunjin sobbed. Chan immediately went to comfort the boy,
"So, why are you crying?" Chan Asked Jisung,
"S-she was m-my b-bestf-f-friend." He stuttered, tears still falling from his face. Chan did his best to calm them both down, temporarily succeeding until they thought of her again a once again, broke down. "Her f-funeral i-is o-on frid-d-day. I-is o-our schedule f-free?" Hyunjin asked the elder,
"Yes, it's free. But we have to tell the company where we're going." Chan sighed,
"W-we?" Jisung asked,
"Yes, we. If two of you go them we might as well bring the whole group. I'll go call the company now." Chan said as he left to look for is mobile phone.

Jisung's hand shook as he reached for the pink and purple box on his desk, an untouched letter still sitting on top. He slowly opened it, to find a stained paper with neat but slightly smudged writing on it. He read the letter and sobbed,
"This is all my fault.
If it weren't for me, you'd still be here.
If I hadn't left,

If I had stayed." He hugged the letter.

Hyunjin had left, he probably went to his own room. Jisung was left alone, he placed the letter on his desk and opened the box, there was still a pen and blank paper inside, he carefully removed them from inside the box and he opened the first letter he saw, it was her most recent one.

He cried as he read it. He looked at the pile of paper in the box, these were a compilation of their memories, a compilation of her.

Jisung read each letter, one by one, crying more and more with each one he read,

14 September 2018,

Dear Jisung,

Happy birthday! I wish I could tell you this in person but due to your career and the distance, I can't.

Remember the first time we celebrated your birthday together? It was your 14th. God, it seems like yesterday but it was ages ago! We celebrated at the park with all your friends. I remember the candles not lighting because of the wind. You ended up ditching the candles and we all had a piece of the cake.
I remember getting you a pair of new, designer shoes from your favourite brand's new line.

Jisung smiled slightly, he still wore those shoes today, he rarely ever wore them, so they were still in good condition, his feet never seemed to grow either.

The boy looked at the blank paper and pen on the desk and started writing,

8 January 2019,

Dear Eunjin,

Ever since I left, I thought of you daily, although I tried to think of you less, I couldn't help it, I got told off by my teacher once, I zoned out, thinking of you.

I'm sorry I left.
I'm sorry I wasn't there when you needed me most.
I'm sorry I wasn't there in your last moments of life.
I'm sorry I couldn't realise your feelings sooner. I guess you only love someone once they're gone, huh.

I don't think I'll ever be the same again. I missed you. And I regret never coming back to visit. I regret not trying to talk to you during my training period.

I love you. And I'm so sorry, this is all my fault.

Jisung looked up from the paper and decided to go buy something, he'd carry on writing later.