hurt myself by hurting you~ jiara

never enough

~Still jjs pov ~

We started driving back, and I had a feeling of regret running through my whole body.
I shouldn't be doing this. But I know that Sarah would cry and die if her mom dies...
To be clear- I only do this for sarah...

I sat alone at the back of the boat, dangling my feet in the water. I just keep having these thoughts- and these weird feelings all the time.

"Hey" kie whispered and sat down next to me.I only nodded in response

"Look, if you won't tell me let me atleast guess" she said and I turned to her

"What do you mean?" I asked confused

"Something's wrong" she replied, and I turned away again
"Tell meeee" she teased by shaking me

I was really about to tell her- but she would literally kill me. Nevermind I'm gonna tell her..

"My dad called rigth?" I started

Her expressions went into madness and worried and ohh- I knew she was about to throw me into the water

"He said Veronica will visit him, and that he will try to kill her" I continue like I didn't saw her expressions

"What?!" She asked shocked
"What the hell?!"
"First, what a great friend you are jj. You would keep that secret from us?"
"And second, what do you wanna do about it huh? She's a beast she isn't even a real mother for you."

"Kie-" I said but she interrupted me

"Do not tell me that is the reason you wanted to go back"

"Kiara-" I said a little bit louder

"Jj- Stop helping people that don't deserve it." She continued

"KIARA." I shouted shaking her shoulders

"What?" She quickly responded

"I don't do this for her, I do it for sarah."
"Would you love it when you momma dies?" I replied
She looked at me like she was realizing what I was about to do

"No-" she said
"Forget it. No jj just no" she shouted

"What?" I asked, hoping she didn't knew I was about to save her

"We won't let her be at the Chateau- not even a second" she said and I relieved

"Yeah- good" I smiled and she smiled back

"And hey-" she quickly said before she walked away "Don't you dare do something stupid" she added and as she wanted to walk away I grabbed her waist

"Please let this stay between us? I don't want them to know.." I whispered letting go of her waist

"Sure" she smiled softly and hugged me
"Don't worry your secrets are safe with me" She joked

"Hahaha" I fake laughed
"So funny!" I said sarcastically
She slapped my shoulder and walked away

I didn't even notice but a small smile grew on my lips- it was more like I was happy to have her smile I remembered her words
"If you leave, I leave."   She really was about to jump with me- well sarah was too but with kie it was different..

She always had a big place in my heart but it the last month's it felt like she was my whole heart.

The next morning we were almost back cause we didn't make any break like last time.

"Ready?" Kie whispered
I nodded with a fake smile, and again I was regretting for not telling them my plan. But if I did they wouldn't let me do it