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Another day...
Another morning...
Still, it did nothing to calm the turmoil I felt inside of me. Everything around me was just the same but I didn't feel the way I used to. I feel hateful all the time, anger is the only emotion coursing through my veins right now.
Ten days, I spent ten days in that cell but it felt like a year. It felt as if that cell didn't belong in this world, time passed by slowly there.
I looked out of the window and felt nothing... this view always brought me comfort but now it did nothing to me. Nothing to calm the storm brewing inside of me.
I remember looking out of this window and dreaming of a life outside these four walls. I thought it'd be a fairy tale. I thought my parents were wrong and the world out there was anything but evil.
“The world is a dangerous place and you are easy prey, Evangeline. You are innocent and naive and you lack physical strength. This world will chew you alive.”
My dad wasn't wrong. He wasn't wrong at all but he betrayed me too. He lied to me about who he was. He had created a small fantasy world just for me where everything was perfect. He made me this stupid, this weak, this helpless. If he had been truthful and taught me how this world worked, I would have known what to expect. I wouldn't always try to see the good in people. I hate it. I hate this. I hate my life. I hate this room. I hate Bianca. I hate Scott. I hate... Nikolai. I hate him.
Stepping out of the room, I looked down the long hallway that led to the staircase. I took small steps and went downstairs. I made my way to the kitchen and heaved a sigh of relief when I found it to be empty. I took out a tumbler from the kitchen cabinet and poured myself a glass of cold water.
It was so silent, so deadly silent, unlike my mind which was in chaos. I sniffled and opened the refrigerator door. The refrigerator was filled with different ingredients. I was in no mood to cook, I slammed it shut and turned to look for a box of cereal.
"You're awake?" Nikolai stood in the doorway.
He was wearing a white t-shirt and grey sweatpants. His hair wasn't made and was all ruffled up. His eyes were bloodshot as if he had never gone to sleep last night.
"Come on, I'll make you breakfast."
I didn't have the energy to put up a fight. I settled on the kitchen island seat and put my head in my hands. Taking it as a yes, he strolled inside and started to make breakfast for two.
He placed a plate in front of me with bacon and eggs. I silently started to eat and then the self-loathing crept up. I couldn't even make breakfast for myself, good for nothing stupid, Evangeline, can't even make breakfast. My appetite vanished within seconds and I had only taken two bites so far.
Tears brimmed in my eyes, and my skin started to itch. A violent urge to scratch my skin off crept up.
"The doctor will be here later today to change that bandage on your head. Next time, you want to take a shower, just tell me, okay? Do not let water get under your bandage..." Nikolai voiced sitting beside me.
