Hiraeth | Regulus Black

Chapter Ninety Nine

Sitting opposite each other on the sofa, their legs crossed and blankets tugged over their shoulders, there was a silence that had fallen between Esmerelda and Dirk.

"It, erm..." Esme fumbled over her words, "I'm sorry."

"Sorry?" Dirk asked, "What for?"
She shrugged, "I don't know. It's a thing people say, isn't it?"
He smiled softly at her, "I think so, but you don't need to."

"Okay, cool."

Another silence settled between them for a moment before Dirk spoke up again.

He cleared his throat slightly, "How are you doing?"
"What? With knowing my f-Lucas tried to kill me? I'm delightful." She responded, tugging the blanket tighter around herself.

Dirk sighed, "At least Mr. Horix really liked you."
"Yeah, that was a nice surprise."

"Um... I meant to tell you as well..." He ran his hand through his hair as he paused slightly, "I wanted to say, I'm sorry I haven't been around much. You know, I feel like we haven't seen much of each other recently. At least... Not like we used to."

Esme responded, "You're busy; you've got a life and a job. I'm cooped up here being hunted by the Ministry and the Death Eaters. Don't worry about it. You're still my best friend."

"Really? You haven't replaced me yet?"
She laughed slightly, "What? You idiot, no. You'll always be the loser who was friends with me when nobody else was. You're not getting away that easily."
Dirk chuckled, "I'm glad to hear that."

Meanwhile, in the kitchen, Regulus Black was blowing the steam off the top of his mug of tea that he cupped in his hands.
Sirius was sat on one of the dining chairs that he'd set in the doorway, where the doorway was open, and he had a lit cigarette between two fingers.

"You know if you drink much more tea, you're going to turn into tea leaves." He pointed out as he watched his younger brother.

"I might be surprisingly alright with that." Regulus responded, taking a sip of his drink.
Sirius sighed, shook his head, and took a drag of his cigarette, "I'll let Avery know, shall I? That you're about to become a pile of soggy leaves?"
He chuckled slightly, "I think she might argue that it wouldn't be a noticeable difference." 

"Glad to see you're back to your snarky self." Sirius replied with a roll of his eyes.
"Well..." Regulus took another sip, "It's about time..."

His brother asked, "You still hung up on being betrayed by our parents?"
He nodded, "I know it shouldn't have been a surprise, but part of me always thought they could possibly, one day, become normal parents. Then they went and sold us out to the Death Eaters, so that was nice."

"I should have put money on that happening." Sirius responded.

"I'm a complete idiot for always expecting more of our parents, aren't I? I should just lower my expectations so they don't disappoint me again." Regulus mumbled.
"No," Sirius disagreed, "It's not your job not to be disappointed. It's their job to meet the expectations of their children."

He nodded solemnly, "Thanks."
"Anytime."

After a few moments of quiet between them, Regulus spoke up again. He asked, "How did you stop caring what our parents thought?"

"Well... Since I started at Hogwarts I had all my friends that I considered family. I cared about what they thought, not anyone else." He explained.
Regulus slowly nodded in agreement, "I suppose I didn't have that when I went to Hogwarts. I didn't really connect with anyone in Slytherin."

Sirius took a final inhalation of smile before extinguishing the cigarette on the outside wall. As he exhaled, he thought, "I suppose that's why you're clingy around Avery. She's your James."