Selfish | Jacob Black [2]

0.13

Chapter 13: True Feelings

Calculating blue eyes watched Jacob and Bella from across the room, not being able to take her eyes off while Carlisle fixed her injury. A soft cotton ball was ran over the cut with rubbing alcohol but Amaya couldn't even feel the sting of the disinfectant. "It's superficial," Carlisle's smooth voice broke the silence making the blonde jump, breaking her intense gaze towards the duo.

"Sorry, I figured it wasn't anything serious. I couldn't even feel it on the way back."

There was a silence between them for a moment before he spoke again. "He didn't think she'd look the same."

"Excuse me?"

"You're wondering what they're talking about, Bella and Jacob? He didn't think she'd look the same." Carlisle repeats himself, nodding his head towards the conversation in the adjacent room. "Except for the creepy eyes."

Amaya looked down at her fingers, not wanting to see them any longer. "He wouldn't care if she had another mouth on her forehead, he loves her too much."

"I'm not sure how true that is anymore."

The blonde looked around the room, her orbs catching sight of the folder on his desk and out of curiosity she flipped it open, taking note of the neat numbers that were written on the paper."What's this?"

"It's Renesmee's growth patterns."

"I thought she was only a couple months old."

Carlisle glanced at the folder momentarily before going back to cleaning up his area, burning the gauze that had her blood on it. "She's been growing at an alarming rate," He admits, a sadness lingering in his tone. "Would you like to meet her?"

From in the other room, Amaya could tell that the baby was in Bella's arms, a head full of soft brown hair on her head but she looked away before she could see her face. "No, I'd rather not. Thanks for the patch-up but I have to go."

She barely made it past the door when she felt a warm hand curling around her arm. "Amaya, where are you going?" Jacob ran after her, completely bypassing Bella who was cut off mid-sentence. "Hey, slow down."

"You don't have to follow me, Jacob. If you want to be with her, it's fine."

He pulled her into him. "I know that what I did before would make you think that but I don't want her anymore. These past few months with you have been so amazing you don't understand."

"I do, actually, because I was there too. I just know how much she means to you and—"

"She can mean something to me as a friend. I don't want her, Maya. I want you and only you and I'll spend the rest of my life proving it to you."

She wanted to believe him, she could even see the honesty in his hazel eyes. "I'd like to believe that, but I don't see a future with you as long as she's around. I'd love for us to stay friends, but you and I? It'd never work."

"Because you won't let it."

"I have a reason not to."

Jacob scoffed at her, his hands lifting up to run through his shaggy hair. "Not anymore, I've proven myself to you. I love Bella, she's my best friend but you're my imprint and I want to show you how that feels."

"Jake—"

"No, just trust me for once, believe I am a better man than I was before. Just trust me."

Amaya went silent, her beautiful baby blues peered up at him, her mouth slightly parted as she struggled to find the right words to say to him. She was trying so hard and while she was being stubborn, she thought she had the right to because of everything he'd done but the more she held it against him the worse she felt holding the same grudge against him. She wanted them to move on from the issue and be happier but it was proving to be harder to just let it go. "Okay, I trust you but Jake, please I can't stand for you to choose her over me again."

"If it makes you feel any better, when I saw Bella I expected to feel something but I felt nothing."

"Maybe it's the creepy eyes."

Jacob's unique laugh passed through his lips, straight white teeth on display as his shoulders shook with each laugh. "Where's Seth?"

"Inside with the kid, you want to see her?"

She hesitated, her hands rubbing against the side of her jeans. "Actually, I was wondering if I could talk to Leah. I was pretty harsh the last time I saw her and I'd really like to apologize."

"You're already forgiven," A familiar voice called from behind her, a lean but muscular body protruding from the trees. "I suppose I should be saying sorry too, I did just leave you without much explanation."

"I wasn't so much angry you left me as much as you just leaving Jax without even letting him know why. He thought he did something wrong."

Leah's face twisted in pain at the thought of hurting her imprint. "How is he? I haven't really seen him since then, well I have but he hasn't seen me."

Amaya stopped the short haired werewolf with the simple raise of her hand. "Leah Clearwater, please tell me you haven't been stalking my best friend."

"I couldn't help it," She admits shamefully, taking the necessary steps needed to be closer to the girl she'd be happy to call a friend and even a sister. "The bond was killing me being so far away from him and when he went back to Chicago for those couple days I promise I thought I was going to die."

Amaya brushed a piece of her light hair behind her ear, eyes rolling jokingly. "You're one of those girls."

"I don't mind, I like having someone to fawn over it's better than wanting someone you can't have."

"Does that still hurt?" She pressed, noticing how Jacob had already retreated back into the large glass home. "The Sam thing."

"No."

"So I can say, that I think it's a good thing you and Sam broke up. Looking at the two of you it wouldn't have worked, you're a dominant spirit and Sam is controlling you wouldn't have liked it and it would've fallen apart anyways. Emily's really tame and it compliments him better."

Leah expected to feel uncomfortable but it made her feel a little better knowing that Sam would be with someone that he would last with. "What do you think about Jackson and I?"

"He's a wild child, he'll definitely bring out a more fun side of you. He'll make sure you're always smiling and he's a good listener but when he does something wrong he's a good sweet talker so watch out for that."

"I want to see him, do you think he'd be up for that?"

Amaya shrugged even though she was perfectly aware that Jackson would be ecstatic to see the beautiful quileute again. "You should call him and find out."