The Deal

27. Mom & dad

Isabella Rose

I've spent that last few days at Tanyas apartment. She is traumatized from that night. And I feel horrible for even inviting her. I should've kept her away from all of this.
For each day that goes by I also blame myself for it all. Matteo did continue to take the drugs just because of me. If I had told Valentino maybe...maybe this wouldn't have happened. He could have stopped it.
I could have stopped it but instead I trusted Matteo to handle it himself. It was stupid of me.

But as mad I am at myself I'm also mad at Valentino. How could he ever think I wanted this. To say I was the reason his brother almost died was cruel. I would never intentionally hurt anyone. Especially not him.
Did I lie yes. But I was not the reason Matteo did what he did.
He blamed it all on me not listening to anything I had to say. I've never seen him with such anger towards me.
This only proves that he suck at communication. And we could've never happened because we are too different. His way of solving things is not mine and I should've known it sooner. Before I fell for him.
It was so hard seeing the man you fell in love with build up such hatred towards you in just seconds.

I can't live with Tanya. I'm no good for her right now. As long as I'm here she is going to be included in this mafia life and I do not want that for her.

My only last option is my parents. I have nowhere else to go. I'm going back to that hell of a house to try and go on with my life.

I'm meeting them today for the first time in 4 years.

"Bella I can't let you leave. You hate your parents" Tanya says trying to convince me to stay.
"It's the best I could think of for now. Don't worry I'll get my own place as soon as I get my life together" I say knowing there is no chance for me to get my own house anytime soon.
I'll have to live with my parents for a long time.

"I should get going then. Wish me luck" I say as Tanya hugs me goodbye.

"Good luck Bella" she says.

***

I take the bus to our old address. I hope they still live there.
I step out the bus and look at the house I grew up in. It never felt like home to me. More like a haunted house. Nothing in there made me happy.

I take a deep breath as I knock on the front door. Why am I so nervous.

The door opens slowly and a woman's head pops out. She doesn't recognize me at first.

"Hi mom" I say. Her eyes widen as she opens the door fully.

"Oh...Isabella great to see you" she says not hugging me like most moms would.
I enter the house as she walks me to the living room.
We both take a seat on the couch. The couch my dad always used to sleep on. When he was drunk of course.

"It's been how long now, a year?" She asks not remembering when she saw me last.

"Actually it was 4 years ago" I say. Great to know they did not miss me at all.
"Oh was it! Time flies by fast." she says.

It's so awkward.

"Mom? I have decided to move back in here" I say going straight to the point. I am not here to play good kid. I just need a place to sleep.

"Honey that is not possible right now... we have... I mean there is a lot for us right now" she says obviously lying. She simply does not want me here. They never did.

I roll my eyes.
"I'm your child mom. I'm staying not because I want to, but because I have no other choice. You will let me stay end of discussion" I say demanding.

She nods.
"Your old room is a little messy, clean it. You can stay there." She says trying to stay calm. I've never been strong enough to talk back to any of my parents. Now that I'm older I feel like they can't hurt me.

But her eyes still scares me to this day.

I open the door to my room. It's disgusting. It's been used as a trashcan. I hold my nose stepping inside. Well this place needs a lot of cleaning.

I get right to it and throw out almost everything. Mom gives me the cleaning stuff as I mop the floors and wash the bedsheets.

Lastly I spray the room with perfume to get rid of the smell.
This will do.
Almost as good as new.

I unpack my bag and put the clothes I brought in a drawer.

I've been checking up on Matteo a lot these last few days. He's alive thank god. I called him yesterday. He said he was finally out the hospital and back home. He still doesn't know why I moved out. And I don't think I will tell him.

I hear screaming from outside my room. I peak my head out to see what's going on.
My dad is home. Drunk. He is throwing things towards mom.

"Hey! Stop" I yell stepping out of my room.

He turns around. Looking at me like I'm someone new. Someone he's never known.

"This is Isabella dear, she is staying with us for a while" mom says from beside him.
"Oh my precious daughter! You are back!" He comes up to me with open arms to hug me. I can smell the alcohol from miles away.
I hold my breath as he gives me a hug.

"Look at you! You've become a woman" he says. My dad has two sides to him. One day he is kind of nice. And another he is totally changed. A monster. I never know what side of him I get.

"We should celebrate this! Go buy some drinks for tonight" he says.

"I'm not here to drink with you guys. I would much rather not talk to any of you actually. I just need somewhere to sleep that's all." I say making sure they know I'm not here to make peace with them.

His mood shifts immediately. "That is no way to speak to your father" he says.

"Since when have you ever been a father to me?" I say standing my ground. I'm not going to be weak this time.

"Fuck off before I decide to kick you out" he spits.
I storm into my room and lock myself in. I fall to the floor crying, feeling so alone and hopeless.

You got lucky 🍀 I've posted 3 chapters this week! Woohoo!

I'm so happy that I'm back to writing again. For a while ago I had no motivation but you guys really keep me going.
I love seeing the positive comments,
that is what's keeping me motivated, thank you all!

See you next week lovelies!