Coulda been

16|RED

The following afternoon found me in the bathroom holding a pair of scissors in one hand while the other held pieces of my hair-

I screamed so hard I felt my ribcage crack and slice into my lungs,making blood crawl up my throat to the base of my tongue- or atleast that's how it felt.
Ion know why I cut my hair that day,all I know is that my momma had gone out to look for a job(figured that'd be helpful since staying home and making money for the surgery was impossible,and I was dying anyway) and I'd grabbed the pair of scissors as soon as WFM, Kyrie's favourite came on and started cutting my hair off.
I'd been pulling at it all night,waking up with an excruciating migraine that caused my eyes to blur-then again,it might've been the tears...

I looked like my first Barbie doll,the ends were uneven,my hair both brown and black in different places,blood lining my hairline from how aggressively I'd cut at my hair- I was gon get it,and mama was gon seeeerve it like a chef!

                          FROST❄️
           Mel:HELP!!I cut my hair- it was a mistake and now I look ugly and mama's gon bury me in the backyard where no one will ever find me😭😭
  
                                                                       
AFTER TWO HOURS of sweeping my hair off the floor and trying to shove it down the drain,my nerves were shot and I was trembling-my teeth literally sounded like a skeleton in the wind and my hands couldn't even grasp a single hair.  I couldn't stop crying when Frost came rushing through the door,slamming it open and standing there with wet hair,a plastic bag,his phone and car keys in the other hand.
"Ohh sweetie,what happened in here?" He asked as his eyes looked into mine,asking for permission to approach and I collapsed into his arms,full on sobbing as he patted my back reassuringly,
"Hey hey it's okay, we're here for you...me, Mist,the twins and Everest too, yeah. it's okay shh" he rocked back and forth with me hiccuping until I couldn't get any air to my lungs.

"Melanie I don't know what to do!please stop crying you're gonna kill yourself, breathe properly!" He yelled-panicked-causing the others to cram into the bathroom surrounding me while chanting encouraging words.
"Yeah just breathe with us...hm.m iiiin,breathe oout-yes,yes you're doing it!"

The boys scattered around my room quietly doing one thing or the other,the twins were sprawled over each other on the carpet as they went through my Spiderman comics, Mist was leaned against the bookshelf with The great Gatsby in his hand while Everest lay in his lap blowing rings of smoke while he snacked on Doritos. Frost nudged me forward with a small smile on his face, encouraging me to step fully into the room with my new hairstyle. He'd dyed my hair a glaring RED,which wasn't at all meant to look natural,it was quite the middle finger to anyone who dared to look long enough to notice the jagged and uneven cuts of the hair strands,I looked good with finger waves.



I'd chewed nervously on my nails as he tapped his fingers on my forehead and used the curling iron on me-the skin surrounding my nails was literally bleeding and I couldn't stop peeling it off.

"Stop,you're hurting yourself" the boys looked up just as I folded my arms behind my back and they all awed, Mist jumping onto his feet to squeeze my barely there cheeks and crush me in a hug.
"Melaniiiiie,Chile you look fiiiiine! How Frost did allat for you when he won't even touch my head?smh it's giving irrelevant with my ass" he whined,drawing me back so he could look at me then break out into a grin again.
"Yeah Mel,you look... pretty-" Shadow hiccuped,making all the other guys give me thumbs ups while laughing.
"Your tomboy ass finally look like a girl! Y'all think I should open a salon?I mean she pretty and allat,but this all me" Frost flexed,doing the running man before plopping down on my couch haphazardly.
"You guys are just saying that to make me feel better-...oh yeah, where's Devon?" Everyone's faces kinda fell,and Frost beckoned me over with the most adult look I'd ever seen on him,"he's...he's going away for a while. his ass thought it-it would be better to stay away from you so that by the time he left,you wouldn't think about him anymore...he doesn't want you to miss him."
My own face contorted into a look of misery,tears forming in my eyes as Frost tried to hug me,his eyes filling with pain as I pry his arms from me.

"His stepdad got a job in Chicago...and-well his momma is going too,which-which means he goes too" Shadow said softly,looking down as he notices a tear dropping from my eye,"well...uh,you know when he's leaving? Please...tell him I'd like to see him before he leaves,if that's aight wi' him."

This felt awful,it felt like everyone I loved was leaving me alone.
Hakeem had gone M.I.A, Kyrie Jackson was just too good for me,my group of five friends had fallen apart in the span of just 2 weeks and Devon - he was moving and he didn't even wanna see me before he left.

The rest of the afternoon was spent lazing around in my room,passing blunts and double cups and singing along to TAYLOR FREAKIN SWIFT-for niggas from the hood,they sounded pretty good

My anxiety had calmed for a bit,easing up enough for me to chat freely with the guys without being scared of saying something wrong-the afternoon was GIVING!!