Yuri!!! On Ice Oneshots

Anxiety

'No... No no, breathe, calm down, relax youre fine everything is ok... No its not, everything is wrong, you are not ok don't lie to yourself you know better...'

Yuuris head was filled with these thoughts as he stood in the locker room, holding the side of his head, tugging gently at his hair, trembling. He had just performed his short program and made quite a few mistakes along the way which had earned him a very low score. He was embarassed and ashamed, he felt dizzy as he let the blackouts come and go as he stood there, harshly criticizing himself. "I wonder what Victor is gonna think..." He finally said aloud. Just that moment Victor walked into the locker room with an unreadable expression, the door closing was enough to pull Yuuri out of his shocked state. He gasped and turned around, immeadietly covering his face as he sobbed. "Oh V-victor... I-im so sorry I didnt mean to mess up all those jumps a-and I didnt mean to--" , "Yuuri..." Victor chimed in softly. "Its ok, come here." He held out his arms for Yuuri to join him but he widened his eyes as he saw the younger man drop to the floor on his knees, still crying. He rushed over and inspected him quickly before gently rubbing his shoulder and grabbing them. "Yuuri look at me... Please." Yuuri took a deep breath and he looked up at the other, his hair was a mess, partially still slicked back and some of it back to what it usually is, sweat and tears were dripping down his red face and his eyes seemed to shimmer with tears. He blinked causing a few to fall and Victor, softened his expression, wiping them as they fell gently off of his soft cheeks with a gloved hand. "Im so sorry...", Yuuri apologized again and Victor immeadietly shook his head and pulled him tightly into a hug. A gasp left him as his lip quivered, he hugged back burrying his face into Victors shoulder, he quickly pulled away realizing he was getting tears on the others jacket. Victor rubbed his back gently and moved a hand to the back of Yuuris head, gently pushing him back down, letting him set his head in a comfortable position. "Its ok, its only tears they will dry out eventually.", Victor reached over to his plush tissue box holder and pulled one out, gracefully handing it to Yuuri, continuing to stroke his back gently and shush him. He wiped a few tears and blew his nose, crinkling the tissue and gripping it in his hand he hugged Victor again.

They stayed like that for a while until the crying stopped and Yuuri could breathe properly again. He slowly pulled away from Victor but was stopped once again. Yuuri looked at him confused and Victor responded by gently cupping his face and moving his hair out of his eyes. "Despite your score today...Im proud of you... You did your best and that is all I ever ask of you." He handed Yuuri another tissue and took his old one, skillfully tossing it into the trash. "I did... I just wish I couldve done better for you... After all you are my coach and I should be expected to impress you..." Yuuri said softly, wiping his face once again, he winced as he felt his head throb.

"Yuuri my love... You are much more to me than just my student, how could you forget?" He was right, They were engaged and Yuuri felt a pang in his chest. "N-no thats not what i meant! I just... I love you Victor... Im just shy and we're at a competition... You're always my Fiancé but right now you're my coach, I guess my brain registered it like that. Please forgive me.", Yuuri finished with a little bow and Victor chuckled softly. "I forgive you darling, don't worry about that." He managed to pull a smile from Yuuri, this caused him to happily trap the younger mans face into a sweet and passionate kiss.

"You may not have won gold this time around, But I will always kiss you no matter what the score may be." Victor winked and kissed his ring and went back to his lovers lips, where they lay there until someone inevitably walked in on them, making them seperate and go home.

(I hope you enjoyed! I wrote this during a small anxiety attack and writing it helped me alot, I tried to represent what it feels like to have anxiety as best as i could but i am not good with words

💙❄)