I Loved You Before I Met You (New Version)

34

   It's been a week and a half since moving in with Lauren. It's the second week of June which means I have 14 days left of school. I am so ready for those 14 days to be over with. I'm ready to graduate and be done with high school. I haven't talked to my sperm donor since he kicked me out. He hasn't tried to contact me and it's for the best. I don't want anything to do with him.

   Things have been good with just Lauren and I living together. We have a great routine going and it seems to flow naturally between us. I haven't been flirting with her but she has caught me staring at her a few times. She hasn't made a big deal of it or said anything though. Usually she just shakes her head or arches an eyebrow at me which is so damn sexy.

   Lauren is officially divorced and ended up getting half of everything her and Mike had. She didn't want anything from him but the judge ruled that half of everything acquired after they were married was legally hers. I also got my car back, all thanks to Lauren. Once she apparently told the judge it was a gift from both of them, he ruled that Mike couldn't take it back.

  It's Thursday afternoon and Lauren and I are currently in the kitchen cleaning up after dinner. I offer to do all the cleaning but Lauren insists on helping. We don't have a lot of dirty dishes so she said she would just wash them by hand since it wasn't enough to run the dishwasher. She washes the dishes and I dry them and put them away. After I get the last dish dried and put away, I turn around and I'm hit in the face with soap suds.

   Lauren and I both start laughing so I roll up the towel and pop her on the butt with it as she turns around. She squeals a little, grabs more soap suds and slings them at me but this time some nearly goes in my eyes. Luckily I closed my eyes just in time before any soap got in. She starts to laugh and tells me to hold still. I feel her hands on both sides of my face as she carefully wipes the soap suds away. After wiping the last little bit off, her hands stay gently on my face.

   I open my eyes and Lauren is staring at me like she is lost in thought and her bottom lip clenched between her teeth. I don't know why but I reach forward and use my thumb to pull her lip free from her teeth. I glance down at her lips then back to her eyes. She smiles as she glances down at my lips. Before bringing her eyes back up, she gently slides one hand down under my jaw to the side of my neck. My heart is beating like crazy now and I have the urge to pull her into me and kiss her but I don't. "What are you doing to me?" Lauren whispers more to herself.

   Lauren is staring at me and I just stare back at her. She is absolutely beautiful and I can't help but fall more in love with her than I already am. I know without a doubt, I love her. I've never felt anything like what I feel for her. I've never loved anyone before so all these feelings are new to me but I know what I feel. I want Lauren so bad and not just in a sexual way. It scares me how she makes me feel.

   I just stand there waiting to see what Lauren is going to do next. I glance down and notice the rapid rise and fall of her chest. Looking back up I feel her thumb gently sweep across my bottom lip and she starts leaning in closing the gap between us. Before I have a chance to think, her lips are on mine and it feels like electricity running through me. The feeling sends tingles everywhere through my body. It feels like the weight of the world and all the mess from the past few weeks just melts away.

   I move my lips with Laurens and pull her closer to deepen the kiss. She moves both hands to my hair and pulls my face closer if even possible. I slid my tongue across her lips and they part, allowing me to slide my tongue in her mouth. Our tongues dance around exploring each other's mouths. I pick her up and set her on the countertop and she wraps her legs around me.
Lauren moans into my mouth as I run my hands up her thighs and I feel her open her legs a little more. I pull her closer to the edge of the countertop so our bodies are touching. We finally break apart to catch our breath and I rest my forehead against hers. Before I can say anything reality kicks in and she pushes me back and gets off the countertop.

   "Fuck, I'm... I'm so s-sorry, I shouldn't have done that. That shouldn't have happened" Lauren says. She shakes her head "why... why did you kiss me back?"

   I reach out for her but she moves back. "I'm sorry Lauren, I thought that was what you wanted since you kissed me first. She shakes her head again and takes off to her bedroom. "Lauren wait" I yell but she doesn't stop and I hear her bedroom door slam shut.

   I know there's no use in following Lauren so I grab my keys to go for a ride. I need to give her space since she obviously doesn't want to be around me right now. She probably will not want me living with her now either, even though she kissed me first. I guess I should have never agreed to live here in the first place. I was scared I would screw up. I should have stopped her. I just couldn't because I wanted that kiss so bad. I want her so bad.

   Lauren knows I am insanely attracted to her, hell I've even told her that. For me though, it's more than just being attracted to her. Of course she is beautiful but she is so much more. I wish she would give us a chance but I know she's scared. Not only is she scared for her job but I believe she is scared of her feelings for me and because she is attracted to me. I know she could get in trouble if we were together and I definitely would not want to be the reason she got in trouble, got fired or arrested.