South Park Zodiacs

[ 79 ]

[ Text talks ]
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Aries:
You: Dude, you were sooo drunk last night.
Clyde: no I wasn't!!!
You: Yes you were....a guy robbed your house and took your tv.
Clyde: So...?
You: And you ran after him and said "You forgot the remote control!!!!" ...
Clyde: ...

Taurus:
Craig: What would you do if I broke up with you?
You: Get back with my ex. :)
Craig: Now I see how much you care, I'm done -.-
You: Hey, you wanna go out?
Craig: Go with your ex.
You: You are my ex. :)
Craig: oh wow....

Gemini:
Kyle: Okay, let's start studying.
You: Ugh, fine.
Kyle: Okay, here's the question. If you have 10 chocolate cakes and a friend asks for 2. How many do you have?
You: 10 chocolate cakes.
Kyle: Okay...? Well if someone forcibly takes 2 of the cakes, how many do u have left?
You: 10 chocolate cakes and a dead body.
Kyle went offline

Cancer:
You: You know what we should do?
Christophe: What?
You: Dig a hole in the park name it "Love"
Christophe: uhhh, why?
You: So we could watch people fall in love
Christophe: This is why I like you. Meet you at ze park.

Leo:
Gregory: The kitchen is where women belongs
You: Do you know why women live longer than men?
Gregory: No why?
You: Because the kitchen is where the knives are..
Gregory: Oh shit..
You: Be afraid, be very afraid..

Virgo:
Wendy: [Your name]!!! TOKEN BROKE UP WITH ME!!!!! :,(
You: Hush little Wendy don't you cry, I'm gonna find you a better guy, and if the guy don't treat you right. I'm gonna put up a good fight.
You: And if the fight goes real well, you're gonna have to bail me out of jail.
Wendy: This is why we're friends

Libra:
Cartman: Why are you going on a walk? It's hella cold outside.
You: Well, because it's 'hella' boring with you guys.
Cartman: How dare yoooouuuuu? >:0
You: Look you lil' boob, you boring af. So..🌚
Cartman: Watch out for your [ Favorite item/thing ]
You: Watch out for your cheesy poofs, iPad, computer, and your iPhone. I won't hesitate to break each and every one of them.
Cartman: Well, shit you got me.
You: Don't try me you trash 🌚🗑

Scorpio:
Kenny: I was gonna tell u my penis joke but I think it's too long.
You: Oh, okay. I was gonna tell you my pussy joke, but you'll never get it.
Kenny: :((

Sagittarius:
Token: Dude wake up
Token: DUDE
Token: DUDE!
You: IT'S 3 AM WTF DO YOU WANT!!??
Token: I made pancakes, want some?
You: Yes.

Capricorn:
Stan: What are you doing?
You: Laying in bed.
Stan: Mmm. Just laying in bed? Nothing else..?
You: I'm eating cereal
Stan: Haha, nice.
Stan: What would you do if I was in bed next to you?
You: Eat my cereal.
Stan: Lol, I mean if the cereal wasn't there.
You: Then, I'd get out of my bed and go get cereal.

Aquarius:
You: IM SEXYier than you AND I KNOW IT
You: To the windowwwwwww
(._.)
         To the walllllllllllllllllll
(/._.)/
You: Toniiiiiiiiiight we are younggggg.
You: Dude, never respond to me or this will never end
You: Aiiiiiiiight.... time to recite lyrics to Justin Bieber songs...
Tweek: IM HERE! IM HERE! PLEASE DONT DO THAT TO ME!! IM TOO YOUNG TO DIE!!!

Pisces:
Butters: 1)What is the first name of the guy on fresh prince of bell air?
2) what is the letter after T?
3) What is the opposite of Stop?
4) Three strikes and you're?
Butters: 5) To find the area of a rectangle, use length times?
6) Do, re, ..., fa sol la ti do
You: Will
U
Go
Out
Width
Mi
Butters: Of course I will! :))

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