Crescent • A Twilight Story

Finding Ourselves

I was pulling up to the farm, spying the others sitting on the porch of the farmhouse. The word farmhouse seemed an injustice, the white brick mansion sprawled with a wrap around deck, and several detached buildings. I grabbed my sweater, waving back as Rosalie held her bulbous belly at the top of the stairs.

Everyone was here, here to witness the miracle of life from a walking miracle herself. Heading up to see them, I was ambushed by a big sweeping hug from Emmett. "All you, kid!"

"Put her down before you squeeze her to death." Rosalie teased, and so began a long line of hugs and hellos, ending with Mae. She pulled me aside as the others were heading in,

"He's not coming out for a few more days. Not until winter break." I waved my hand between us.

"It's okay. Really." She gave me a look that said she didn't believe me. "He should be here."

She put her arm around me. "How're you holding up? After everything?"

"At least I was able to give them a little bit longer in their home. Duke would've been devastated, seeing them sell. But happy they had a chance to get better care for his grandmother." Mae nodded, and Rosalie came waddling after us, taking my hand.

"And now you'll let me steal the guest of honor." She said, leading us inside. "I want to give you the grand tour."

The house was as immaculate in the inside, a nursery already decorated with a theme of stars and moons. She had to stop halfway, catching her breath. Esme seemed to sense this, and they helped her downstairs and to a place to sit. She started to doze, and it'd been such a long car ride, I found myself drifting too.

I dreamt of my last moments with Emily before I came, as we drove to Duke's graveside. I knelt to lay a bundle of fresh flowers before it, sitting in the spot where the grass had worn into the perfect imprint of myself.

She placed a hand on my shoulder, sitting in her wheelchair.

"You know, he'd want you to be happy. Don't you?"

"Not this again." I groaned. "Not with him."

"Well, that's exactly what I said. With Sam. He was dating my cousin after all. Broke her heart."

"I know, I know." I pulled a weed near the edge of the stone. "This is different."

"It really isn't." She said, touching my hair. "I caused Sam immeasurable amounts of pain when I sent him away. When he was already dealing with the guilt of hurting Leah." She pointed to Duke's headstone. "I know you've been through a lot, that you grieve what might've been.

"And yet, this hole in your heart. Is it because you loved Duke so much you can't imagine life without him? Or is the pain you've been feeling not really your pain at all, but his?"

"How would I begin to know?" She gave my shoulder another squeeze.

"Do one thing to make him happy. See if you feel it too."

I promised her I would try.

Though I had no idea where to start.

***

I got the text when I'd left my final exam, rushing out to my car. My bags were all packed, the seat loaded up. I knew before nightfall I'd reach the farm, see everyone.

See her.

The night after prom I told my parents I was going to start taking summer classes. That I'd be staying at school to allow Rory the space and freedom to do whatever she wanted. Wherever she wanted.