Empty {D.Gray-man}

Empty ~ 10

~Bad ending~

⚠️Warning: There will be mention of dark themes such as suicide and implied mental health. Read at your own risk⚠️
*****
Thinking.

That's what Allen was doing since it's the last day to give his answer to Road. To leave this hell or to stay. He knew his answer although he couldn't bear the thought of ever going through with it. He didn't want to be like everyone else.

A liar.

A betrayer.

He didn't want that not one bit but...what could he possibly do?

"It's not like they need you anyway. You're just in the way."

A voice Allen knew all too well. Ever since Choaji started to mentally and physically abuse him the Fourteenth has made it his mission to twist his mind with dark thoughts and feelings.

"Shut up! You don't know anything!"

"Child I have been in your mind. Seen what you've been through and yet you still think I know nothing? That's as laughable as your useless life right now."

"N-No. Just-Just stop please, stop it," Allen's lip quivered, holding his head, fingers not so kindly grasping his white locks in a desperate attempt to stop the voice.

"I bet even Kanda and Jerry find your existence unbearable! Ha! They are probably using you."

"No, no, no! Kanda and Jerry would never do that!"

"So emotional geeze jump off a cliff for all I care. You could choose to accept the truth or ignore it up you. Just know that if I had a body I'd kill you in a heartbeat."

The voice vanished, leaving Allen alone with tears heavily streaming down his cheeks. The Fourteenth would only pop up when he was about to do something very drastic but when people are around he could feel the voice of the Fourteenth fade away but just when he's sad he'll feel him resurface.

Allen sighed, feeling drained, and was now exhausted. He saw Tim fluttering towards his and landing on his shoulder, nuzzling his cheek as if to say 'I'm here for you.'

Allen smiled sadly knowing full well that without his little friend he'd never make it this far. That also includes Kanda and Jerry both of who helped him more than any of the Order has ever.

"Time to give my response to Road." Allen said aloud. He walked out of his room and made his way towards the exit of the Order.

Early in the morning, he made sure Timcampy sent everyone in the Order a message to meet up right outside the exit at noon, which he felt was creeping closer and closer.

He could see the exit of the Order approaching with every step he took. Fingers twitching slightly for the chance to have the cancer stick between his fingers, breathing in the smoke that would fill his lungs up, feeling everything fade away the instant he blew out. Smoking calmed him down. At first, it wasn't for himself but rather the memory of his mentor Cross but now, after everything he's been through, well it just turned into his way of coping. To forget and be free for once only if it was for a short time.

Pushing the big dark-colored doors open, he stepped outside just as a small breeze hit his face. He breathed in the morning air. He asked if Timcampy could show him the time and he smiles sadly.

Eleven fifty.

"Seems the time is creeping nearer and nearer. I wonder how everything will turn out after this?" Allen questioned himself.