My Best Friend's Mediocre Boyfriend

Embarking On Nothing Sinister Because I'm That Type Of Friend

"Did we just...?"

"Make the bed?" He asked as he brushed off his hands and stared at me with eyes that I can't describe the color of because I'm not into him in a way that requires me to memorize that sort of detail.

"We sure did," he continued, hitting me with a saintly smile. "Because we are platonic pals and that's what friends do for one another."

I cup my hands together and swing them from side to side. "I love that my feelings for you are so innocent and pure that when we are together, I'm only consumed by thoughts of assisting you with pulling that pesky sheet over the corner of your mattress."

He wiggled his brows at me. "Now, what do you say we get really daring and wash the dishes next?"

I press my palms to either side of my face and gasp. "You scoundrel!"

***

More than a year earlier

Vanessa

"Well, Vanessa," my boyfriend Matt Jones replied as he wrapped his knit cardigan around my shoulders. "I suppose this is where we say goodbye."

He leaned in, giving me a chaste kiss on the cheek. The action stirred a flutter of a butterfly wing in my belly because I am a scandalous woman. 

"I'm so excited to attend university in New York," I replied, keeping my tone modestly low so as not to give the impression that I was yelling at him. "It will be a great experience for me to step outside of my comfort zone."

"Absolutely, champ," he agreed. "How swell it is that we are two people that don't depend on each other for happiness."

With a schoolgirl giggle, I moved in and ruffled his hair. "Now scamper along," I urged, shooing him off. "And don't come back for exactly 43,829 minutes because-"

"Taking time apart to focus on our interests is healthy," we finished in unison.

"Jinx!" I exclaimed as we hooked pinkies. "You owe me a soda pop."

"Manners, Vanessa," Matt gently reminded me.

"Sorry," I answered with a sheepish grin, twirling a lock of hair around one finger. "Will you please buy me a pop since I said jinx first?"

He nodded. "Thank you." 

Then with a frown, he studied his watch. "Oh dear," he murmured to himself. "It's noon and I have a two-hour commute back to Connecticut so I must get going because I'm a responsible driver and don't want to endanger anyone on the road by impairing my vision from the glare of the setting sun."

I solemnly nodded. It was a serious matter, and I wouldn't protest my boyfriend's wishes. 

"Do you have water?" I asked with grave concern. "Hydration is important and I only saw you drink six glasses today. You know that the recommended intake is eight."

"Of course, sweet pea." Matt slipped inside his vehicle, making sure to buckle his seatbelt and slide his hands into the ten and two position on the steering wheel. He didn't remove his grip, not even to wave goodbye and kept his sights firmly affixed to the road.

He didn't honk the horn either because he was respectful of the neighbors and the squirrels with the bushy tails, but I knew that he was beeping that horn for me in his wholesome heart.