Conan The Dandelion (Boyxboy) ✔

Chapter 22: We See Life in Death

A/N: 26.12.2020

It's between "Ponan" and "Darker". Which one do you prefer?

And can we just take a moment to appreciate the title of this chapter? 😂 I'm sorry but I just love it so much. Yes, yes, let me be proud if my title, thank thee.

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"Parker!" I exclaimed, running after him. He looked over his shoulder and scowled when he saw me.

"Good evening."

"Yeah," he replied, his voice bitter and sharp.

"How are you?" I asked, trying not to shiver from the cold.

"Great."

I smiled. "I'm glad."

Parker narrowed his eyes at me. I must have said something wrong.

"I sent you a few texts, but you never replied to them. Oh, but I know you didn't have any bad intentions-"

"I did."

I paused. "What?"

"I did have bad intentions. I saw your messages and didn't reply to them."

"Oh." I squeezed my hands. I didn't know what to say. "But... Why?"

Parker let out a bitter laugh.

"You have got to be kidding me," he sneered. "Forget it, I have to go."

He turned to leave, but I quickly stepped forward.

"Wait," I blurted. "I don't understand."

"That's the thing!" He shouted, making me flinch. "You never understand!"

"I'm sorry, I-"

His head hung, and he ran a frustrated hand over his face.

"That's not what I want to hear," he muttered. A long silence hung over us, and I waited for him to say something. He looked up with his miserable dark eyes, his dishelved hair falling over his beautiful forehead. "Let's stop this."

"Stop what?" I asked.

"Being friends."

My body stiffened.

"You're going to destroy me all over again," he said, and then he laughed, shaking his head. "You terrify me, Conan. You're small, you're frail, you look like you'd fall over if the wind blew against you, but you're absolutely terrifying."

"I didn't mean to scare you," I said.

"But you did. You still do," he said, looking at me with sadness drowning in his dark eyes. "And it fucking hurts so much."

I flinched, feeling my chest tighten and I felt like I couldn't breathe. Parker seemed so normal, I sometimes forgot he had his own problems. It wasn't easy for him to get over the death of his ex-boyfriend, and Freddie told me Parker's addiction to alcohol started when he passed away. Parker rarely ever spoke about him, but I think his silence spoke louder than words. I didn't know whether or not Parker still loved him, but I knew his death had scarred it, it caused him immense pain. It had left him empty and hurt.