My Life With Him (Mafia love Story) [#1 ɪɴ ʟᴏᴠᴇsᴛᴏʀʏ]

Chapter 21

Katherina POV

How unreal it is that everything is changing in such natural ways like it's all meant to be. But being in some kind of delusion all the time that everything is gonna be okay and not having any kind of control in your life sucks.

I'm very uneasy today, I miss my mom so much, wish she could be here so I can hug her. I want someone to touch me, I want someone to comfort me, I want someone to wrap their arms around me so I can snuggle and tell them how I feel but being the unluckiest person I cannot have what I want and I never will.

Everyone left five days ago and so did Nathan, I haven't seen him since then. Now once again I have nobody to talk too, I'm all alone.

To pass my time all I do the whole day is to read my book, watch tv and cook sometimes. I spend most of my time out on the lawn and rarely Marco says some words to me which are good morning and good evening but Marco brings me whatever of him from the market at any time of the day, which I'm very thankful for.

My life is like put on pause, I cannot even complete my studies which basically means that now I'm underqualified and I can only be a waitress for the rest of my life.

It's frustrating just being stuck in one place while everybody just keeps moving forwards. Nathan is living his regular life while I don't even know what's gonna happen to me next a lot of time.

I have no idea why Nathan hasn't been home from the past five days and why all his friends were here and now why they are gone. I know that Nathan and I aren't like a normal couple who talks about their plans and their day but still, everything is annoying me so much and I'm losing my mind with every passing day.

Maybe it's the expectations I have started having from him which I shouldn't but I cannot stop myself, everything is just happening with me from the very beginning either I want it or not.

I'm laying on the couch from the past three hours with my book, which I haven't read even a single word. My mind is running wild right now, since Nathan and everybody left the first day went quite normal, the second day went kind of boring and but afterward with every single passing day it is getting on my nerves and every little thing is pissing me off.

I have never been a temperamental person but my moods are changing quickly now. I'm feeling sad, angry, frustrated all of it at once. I'm trying to cope up with all of this, with my surroundings but there's just something that is poking me to bust out.

I toss the book on the table and close my eyes to relax, to keep aside all these emotions which are taking a toll on me.

"Ma'am" I open my eyes and saw Rosie standing in front of me, "Would you like to eat some pancakes?" she asked me.

"No, thanks. I'll make it myself when I'm hungry" I told her and close my eyes once again.

"But ma'am you haven't eaten anything since morning".

"I will eat Rosie when I want too," I said to her.

"But ma'am-"

"You can leave now, please," I said to her which made her head drop and she walked away.

God what is happening to me, my emotions are really getting over my head. I immediately regretted how I spoke to Rosie and got up from the couch and followed her in the kitchen.

"Rosie, I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have talked to you that way" I apologize for my behavior.

"No ma'am please, you don't need to say sorry" she smiled sadly at me.

"Yes there is and I apologize for my behavior," I said, she nodded her head lightly and then I walk out of there.

I went to the bedroom and stayed there until everybody left so that I would not let my messed up mood create problems for others and me as well. I decided to read to calm my mind and sat with my book.