7.

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Dave-

"You need to stop fucking with her like that boy. You sitting here claiming you love her so much but you treat her like shit."

I sat in my momma hospital room listening to her tell me about myself.

I sighed running my hand over my face.

"Now you know if Don knew you were doing this with his sister y'all would fall out. You want to lose your bestfriend and your girl?" She asked me.

I shook my head and stayed quiet.

"Nah I don't. You know me and Don been attached since we was in diapers that's my nigga I can't help that I'm in love with his sister though we ain't mean for this shit to happen now we in too deep and I don't know how else to get out but to push her away." I said realizing how fucked up my logic was as soon as I said it out loud.

She shook her head. "You sound dumb as hell you can't be the same son I raised." She said disappointment plaguing her voice.

Last thing I want to do is disappoint my momma. She sick and she not going to be here much longer I need to make sure I get my shit together so she can see me do right for once.

I slouched in the chair next to her bed.

Just thinking about her being gone killed me inside.

Nobody know she sick but Don and Bianca truthfully I been acting out since she got sick almost a year ago. The doctor gave her 3 months to live when she was diagnosed with Lung Cancer and I started getting in the streets reallll heavy. I'm talking full shoot outs in the club in parties, starting unnecessary beef just to fight niggas, Don and I even fell out for a couple months but he knew I was going through some shit so obviously that ain't change our relationship.

During the time Don and I wasn't rocking too much that's when Bianca stepped up as the person I went to. It wasn't planned but one night I was drunk and high as hell and showed up at they house Boogie and Don was out handling a deal and Bianca answered the door.

I cried to her opened up to her you know just being vulnerable and needing somebody close to me to understand where my head was at. I thought I was about to lose my momma and my mind was fucked up. She listened and cried with me. I never had no female treat me the way she did from that night on but my momma and I think that's why I'm so damn attached to her ass and why I want to push her away at the same time.

Now the time coming Im really about to lose my momma and even though I knew it was coming it don't make it no easier. I honestly thought she would be burying me before I had to bury her. I think I was acting so wild because I rather had her bury me early than have to watch my momma die and not be able to do anything about it.

I️ wiped my eyes cause I felt the tears well up but I️ can't let her see me cry. I️ gotta be strong for her I'll never let her see how much this was actually fucking me up.

"I️ know ma I️ have to get my shit together." I️ said.

"You better David you got something good going for you and you ruining it ain't going to help you." She said.

"What you going to do when I'm gone Dave? When I'm not here to set your ass straight? You just going to run around out here fucking all these nasty ass hoes looking for something you ain't going to find in nobody but Bianca. You and her always been close even before y'all crossed the line you want to lose that bond cause you want to be fucking stupid? Huh?" She said pissed at me.

"I️ don't wanna hear that." I️ mumbled.

She always talking about when she gone she know I hate that shit.

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