A Hard Reality

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Hey there, Noodle.

In this update I have one sad thing and one (hopefully) happy thing for you. So if you're not already sitting, you might want to.

*sighs* So even though I had a one shot started, I knew what I wanted to happen in it, could even see it... I just couldn't write it. 😔

So I talked to a lot of my family trying to figure out what to do and Murph (the wisest of all Murphs) gave me advice that I think was hard to hear but what I needed to hear. She told me to be extremely honest with you about what's going on, so that's what I'm going to do.

The reality of my life is this: it got flipped on it's head.

The situation I'm in now is not one I expected or ever planned for. I'm in a place that I didn't think I would ever be in and mentally I don't think I know how to process it all really. It feels as if my world was turned on it's head. Though aspects of it are truly amazing, it's still a reality I'm coming to terms with.

And being in this new world means that I have no idea what my writing looks like anymore. I knew how to write in the worst, most insane times in the life I had only a couple months ago. Now I have no idea.

My stories lived constantly in my head, now when I go searching for them I find completely empty landscapes where they should be. So Murph told me she believes I need to stop completely. I need to stop trying to force my writing because that won't help me in the long run.

(Remember there was a happy part so don't give up on me yet)

So even though it kinda kills me, I'm going to stop trying to write because the sad reality is I feel so empty creatively. I know it will eventually, I have to believe, come back but for now I'm letting go of trying to get it back as soon as possible by forcing something to come.

Please know I want to hug you, give you ice cream, and say I'm sorry for not being able to give you anything new.

BUT! And that's a big booty butt right there, BUT there is something I can give you, wait for it...

OPEN CASE FILE RERUNS!

What that means is I'll be reposting one shots. I know they won't be completely new one shots but I've been writing these for 5 years and I'm guessing not all of you have reread all 200+ one shots recently.

The plan: each week I'll repost a one shot so it will show up like a new update that way it can feel somewhat new!

That means you have to make sure both Open Case File and Case Reopened are in your library so the notifications show up!

Also I will answer any new comments you leave on the chapter so we can still be connected.

I know, it's not new one shots but honestly it's the best answer I can find for the reality of what is going on. You know if I could I would give you all the one shots in the world. But I can't right now.

And as you've all been telling me so much lately you support me taking care of my mental health. So I'm going to trust you mean it and I'm going to do that.

I love you more than you truly will ever understand! I hope to see you in the reruns! I'll be starting reposting next week, so again make sure Open Case File is in your library. I think I'll start with the drunk Donovan chapter. 😏

Here's to having a good time reliving the classics!

Here's to having a good time reliving the classics!

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