1 ~ guilty

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Lottie

A giggle.

A scuffle.

A hissed curse.

"Quiet!" I whispered. "We'll be caught."

"Everyone's asleep," Minho replied. I couldn't see his face in the dark, but I could tell he was rolling his eyes. He was annoyed at my bossiness, but could he blame me? There were seven of us sneaking around the Right Arm's camp at night. Seven times the danger, and seven times the possibility of getting caught.

I sighed. If I had a choice, I definitely would not be doing this. But how else were we supposed to find Newt? He needed us, and that was all that mattered. We saw that he was missing this morning. 

When our group arrived at the Right Arm after years of confinement in the Maze, and weeks of burning torture in the Scorch, we thought we were finally safe. For most of us, we were. But there was one unlucky member of our group who was not an Immune and was forced to be more careful than everyone else, because if he wasn't, he could catch the Flare virus and turn into a Crank - a cannibalistic monster. 

That member just so happened to be the boy I was completely in love with. To our horror, just a few days after we found out that Newt wasn't Immune, there was a Crank attack on camp. We'd lost a few friends during the ambush, but I thought at least Newt had gotten through unharmed. Until he began to change, just a day later. He became cold, cruel, violent. Much unlike the Newt I knew and loved. 

It was only this morning when I figured him out, but it was too late. Newt was already gone. He'd left us to protect us, he'd said in his goodbye letter. He'd asked us to not follow him, which was ridiculous. It was as if he didn't know us at all.

I wanted to leave to look for him as soon as we found his letter, but nobody else agreed. Jorge said that we needed to form a plan before we acted.

Currently, we were executing said plan. Our group of seven consisted of me, Minho, Jorge, Brenda, Thomas, Frypan, and Julian. I had wanted there to be less of us, but they all refused to be left behind. As more and more people wanted to join us, I had to draw the line and forbade everyone else to tell others who might be interested in coming, such as Satomi, the fierce girl we'd met on our journey here, or Sonya, Newt's long-lost sister.

"Nobody will be asleep once we start making noise," said Jorge in response to Minho's remark. "We have to move fast." He started jogging up front, causing all of us to follow his lead. He was light on his feet, making no noise as he moved. "Here," he hissed, and stopped running.

In front of us was a large black silhouette. I wouldn't know what it was if I hadn't seen it during the daytime, but from previous knowledge I knew that there was a Berg in front of us. More specifically, the only Berg the Right Arm hasn't stocked up for takeoff yet.

Now came the part of the plan I was most guilty about. Jorge managed to cause the ramp to descend from the Berg, and ushered us on board. I did so with my head hung in shame. I certainly was not comfortable with stealing this Berg, especially from the people who have given myself and my friends a home for the past few weeks. But alas, what choice did we have? We had to find Newt, and this was the best way to do it. Besides, I've been waiting all day for us to jump into action; I wasn't going to back out now.

I must have worn my guilt on my face all day, because people kept asking me if I was okay. I lied every time, with excuses like being hungry or being tired, or being worried about Newt. I don't think many people believed me.

Rachel – one of the people who worked for WICKED with me before the Maze and before we decided that they were horrible – knew me so well from our time at the facility that the second I lied, she said, "You're up to something, I know it," and looked at me through squinted eyes the rest of the day. She must have told Aris her suspicions, too, because soon enough he was doing the exact same thing.

Sonya was bothering us all day about what we were going to do to find her brother; we kept telling her that we were working on it and would let her know when she was needed. Little did she know, that we were going to leave her behind while we went to go find her brother ourselves. I felt bad for doing that to Sonya, but after reading Newt's letter, I knew that he didn't want anybody to come after him, let alone his own sister. He would be furious if anything happened to her on the journey.

"Are you a snail?" Thomas joked from behind me, grabbing my backpack and pushing me gently up the ramp. "We're in a bit of a hurry here."

"Sorry," I apologized, shaking myself from my thoughts.

Jorge settled himself in the cockpit while the rest of us shucked off our backpacks and collapsed into armchairs, exhausted. It was late. Minho was already asleep on the floor; he didn't have a care in the world about the morals of stealing the aircraft.

The engine roared to life. I felt the Berg rise, and I clutched the arm of Thomas' chair for support before the aircraft began to speed away from the camp through the air. I hurried towards the window to look sadly behind us. Lights had been turned on. I saw shadows of people who were awakened by the engine's sound. Their arms waved frantically at us, trying to get us to come back. Jorge didn't spare them a glance. I stared out the window with one hand pressed against the glass and one to my heart in an apologetic manner.

"They can't tell what you're doing," said Brenda, but in a sympathetic voice.

I sighed. "I know. It just makes me feel better about it all. Newt wouldn't want us to do this."

"But he isn't here, is he? That's the whole point," Brenda replied. I inhaled deeply and returned my gaze out the window. There wasn't a point, really, because it was still pitch-black outside. "Why don't you get some sleep, Lottie? I know you haven't been sleeping well lately."

I nodded, slowly backing away from the window. The couch had already been taken, and so had all of the armchairs. We were all so tired, the others had fallen asleep immediately. I found a comfy-enough-looking patch of floor and settled down there. Brenda must have been right about the sleep I've been getting, because the second I closed my eyes, I fell into a deep sleep. 


A/N

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