Brilliance~{Euphoria}

25- Cover

Pain has become a normal thing for Blair. She's gotten used to the feeling of thinking everything's her fault. Anything bad that happens, she instantly blames herself.

TW: Sexual Assault

I watched as Rue's mom walked into Rue's hospital room. I sat in a chair against the wall twisting my phone in my hands. Studying the tubes and the monitor beeping in the corner my heart started racing. Her mom looked at me and walked over. She gave me a hug as she started crying.

"I'm so sorry you had to find her like that," she said. I held my face as I started crying again. She cried over Rue. Gia walked in and crossed her arms as tears rolled down her cheeks. She slowly walked over to Rue and climbed up on the bed laying next to her. My chest hurt as a tear rolled down my cheek. I pursed my lips and set my head on my knees. I stood up and walked out crying. Trying to keep it together I walked around.

"Blair?" A familiar voice asked. I looked up and saw McKay standing above me.

"Are you okay?" He asked. I covered my face with my hands and sobbed. He grabbed my waist and pulled me in for a hug. He wrapped his arms around me securely and I did the same. I set my head on his shoulder and cried softly. We pulled away and looked at each other.

"How about I take you home?" He asked. I nodded slowly.

We sat in the car as soft music played. I looked out the window and chewed on the inside of my mouth.

"I'm really sorry by the way, about Rue," He said. I gave him a soft smile.

"She'll be okay, she has to be," I said staring out the window.

"You're strong, you'll help her through," He said. I smiled and placed my hand over his. We eventually pulled up. I thanked him and got out. As he drove off I started walking towards Nate's house. Everyone's car but Nate's we're gone. I knocked on the door. The door slowly opened as Nate stood there. I looked up at him. He gave me a sympathetic look and grabbed my hand pulling me inside. He shut the door and looked over at me. He walked towards me and hugged me. I wrapped my arms around his waist and placed my head on his chest. I took a deep breath and held back tears. He stroked my hair and placed a kiss on my forehead. We walked upstairs and into his room. A basketball game played on his TV. I climbed onto his bed and laid down. He laid next to me as I wrapped my body around him. I set my head in his shoulder and shut my eyes. He placed a kiss on my forehead.

"You good?" He asked. I didn't say anything. He looked down at me. I looked up at him as he kissed me. He wrapped his arms around me and flipped me over. I wasn't that into it but it was whatever. I felt as he pulled off my shirt. He pulled his off and continued to kiss me. As he kissed my neck I felt him pull my shorts off.

"Nate i'm not really feeling it right now," I said quietly. He pulled off his pants anyways. I furrowed my eyebrows as he kept going.

"Nate stop," I said looking down. He was still firmly on top of me.

"Nate I don't want to," I said trying to push him off. He kept going.

"Nate stop, please stop," I said crying. I kept trying to push him off. Why was he ignoring me?

"Nate," I screamed and cried. He kept going. I slapped at him as he held my hands up.

"Just shut up and enjoy it, Jesus," He said angrily. I pursed my lips as tears escaped my eyes. I wasn't strong enough against him. I slyly tapped my phone and slid it over to the video. I left it on the dresser. Why did I do that? Instinct? I screamed and tried to resist. I flinched as he slapped me firmly against the face.

"Nate I don't want to do this," I cried.

"Shut up!" He yelled in my face. His spit flying. I shut my eyes and cried softly. My hands let go of the fists they were in as I gave up. I winced as he kept going. After it was over he let go and got up, walking over to bathroom. I slowly sat up and grabbed my clothes. I put them on and grabbed my phone. I walked out crying, covering my mouth with my hand so Nate didn't hear me. My sobs muffled as I walked down his stairs. My whole body still shaken in fear. I walked out and into my house. No one was home but Geneva. She stood in her doorway and watched as I walked by.

"Blair there you are, I thought you dropped off the face of the Earth," she said angrily. I walked into my room and shut the door.

"Blair?!" She yelled. I locked the door and turned around. I slid down the door and tried to be quiet as I cried.

"Blair, what the hell is going on with you?" Geneva asked from the other side of the door.

"Nothing, I'm fine," I said staring ahead at the wall.

"Sure, whatever you say," she said walking away. I looked at the time. 10:34 PM. I walked into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. My mascara was smeared and stained down my cheeks. My hair was messy and I looked like shit. I turned on the shower and sat down in it. I didn't even care to take off my clothes. As the warm water hit my skin I curled my legs up to my chest. I set my head on my knees and wrapped my arms around my legs. What has happened in the past week. I felt empty. Completely empty. Just hollow.