Chapter 28: Messed Up Big Time

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Hope all of you guys are staying safe with the Covid-19 Virus going around.

Look out for the <>!

I looked up at the rink and let out a breath. After taking seven days off from skating I felt like I hadn't been here in forever. For the past four years, I hadn't taken more than five days off from skating at one time.

Anxiety hit me like a bricks as I took a step forward. With the rush of Christmas, for a second it felt like my health just water under the bridge, but standing here, looking at the large building loom over me, the article ran into my mind again. The skaters wouldn't forget either.

What Callum did was heartless. He knew what that secret meant to me and with Nationals only 4 weeks away, word already spread like wildfire. No one would forget it. It was written with such force and direction. Callum knew exactly what he was doing when he wrote that. He wanted to destroy me just like I destroyed our relationship.

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I walked into the rink with my head held up high. Suddenly the business of the rink died down as they stopped to stare at me. It was clear that the whole rink knew my secret. I wasn't battling an eating disorder, I was battling something far more dangerous.

I pulled on my turtle neck sweater as if that would shield my neck from prying eyes. I spotted Cami talking to Tom and Quinn instantly. Cami and I made eye contact and instantly she stopped talking to them. Tom quickly whispered something to both of them and Quinn nodded but Cami just frowned at me. There was so much written in her eyes, but I could only read disappointment.

I stared back at them for a moment. I knew what they were thinking. It was clear that I was the topic for discussion. They would want to talk to me, but I couldn't face them. I knew they would want me to pick a new leader. My title of rink leader was a good a stripped. I wasn't the queen of the figure skaters anymore.

I looked at Cami again, who was still wearing a frown. Cami told me everything. I shouldn't have kept this from her. She was my best friend and she deserved to know. Cami must hate me. Everyone must hate me. With Callum's help, I dug myself into a lonely pit.

Quickly, I found an empty bench and sat down alone in a corner. I put in my music and turned it up as if that would help drown out the voices around me but I knew they were still talking about me. Words like 'sad', 'pity', 'shame' rang out even through my music. For the first time ever, I was the rink gossip. I dug my nails into my palms to fight the tears that wanted to come. I had nothing to hide behind as I heard their words.

"Ellis?" Cami's voice rang out clearly.

Her small stick-like frame stood in front of me with caution. She and I both knew that careful confrontation was never her strong point. She was good a snapping and defending her thoughts. She had no tact when it came to it.

I diverted my eyes back to my skates in silence. I wish she didn't approach me. I rather if she just pretended like I wasn't around. Giving up, I took out my headphones so I could hear her better. I had been preparing myself for this for days but yet I felt not prepared at all.

She straightened her shoulders and stood tall with her skates. She wore her skating dress with confidence as she looked down at me. She looked like a true skater, unlike me who was falling apart in all ways possible.

There was silence as I waited for her to speak, to yell, and to shout. That was what I was used to when Cami was upset. "You didn't sit with me," she stated with hurt clear in her voice.

I was not expecting to see this side of Cami. "I didn't think you would want to be with me."

She sighed as if I didn't get it. She opened her mouth to say something but was stopped by Tom calling out to her. She looked at him as he tapped on the watch around his wrist. They had to get on the ice.

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