Always Alone | ✓

Chapter Sixteen

"A DOLLAR FOR your thoughts?" Devin asks sitting on my couch with a bowl of popcorn.

"Dollar? I thought it was pennies."

"Oh no, Genevieve. Your thoughts are far too precious to be worth pennies."

He turns to me and smiles for a second before his lips turn into a frown. A few days have passed since our time at the festival. Devin and I are trying to mend our relationship the best we can, which bring us to today. We've been watching movie marathons of the Star Wars fandom.

During the movie, my thoughts somehow wander to Alexa and what she really means to Devin. I know she's a big part of his life and as his girlfriend, I'd like to meet her. Maybe we can even become friends. We both deeply care for Devin, so that's one thing we have in common.

"Your thoughts are so loud. Just spit it out."

"It's about Alexa," I blurt.

"What about her?"

"That day, when I saw her and you helped her, she had some bandages on her wrists..."

"Where is this coming from?" I shrug as he breathes profoundly. "She's ill. She has no one but me. Her parents don't give a shit about her and Ernesto, her boyfriend, doesn't care either. I love her like a sister. Nothing more, nothing less."

I understand that her illness is a private matter and none of my business. However, I'd like to meet her and offer my help. "Can I meet her?"

"No," he says abruptly.

"Why not?"

He doesn't answer, instead, he flips the TV off and paces the room. His knuckles turn white by his sides. I begin to feel like I'm fighting a losing battle, but then, he starts talking.

"Alexa...there's so much negativity that surrounds her. I don't want you to be around that."

"How did you guys meet?"

"We met a few years back in a group meeting—"

"Group meeting?" I curse myself for interrupting his flow and fear he'll stop, but I'm relieved when he doesn't.

"Yeah. Where people who are going through the same things find support in each other...?"

"I know what a group meeting is, Devin. What group meeting? What do you need support with?" I can't help the questions spilling out of my mouth.

"That's not important," he says, a bit annoyed. "She was in a very bad place just like me. We found comfort in each other."

Comfort? Thoughts of Devin and Alexa kissing, having sex, float around my brain until I turn into a cherry airhead. My head inflates with images and more questions as my cheeks turn red with exasperation. How can he say he loves her like a sister and have sex with her?

"Did you..." I don't find the courage to finish the sentence.

"In the beginning. We were lost; didn't really know what the hell we were doing. When she met Ernesto, we stopped. We haven't been together ever since. I need you to believe me."

He says it with such conviction that I close my eyes, thinking over his words.

I love her like a sister; nothing more, nothing less.

When she met Ernesto, we stopped.

...believe me.

I believe that everything happens for a reason.

If I wouldn't love to eat so much, I wouldn't have dimples in my butt and thighs. If I didn't have dimples in my body, I wouldn't have gone to the gym. I wouldn't have broken my thumb and I would've never met Devin.