08 || A Visit

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The Color Violet - Tory Lanez

𓆩𓆪
Alexander

I can see the shadowed ceiling of my bedroom when my eyes open, but all I can feel is the building pressure on my spine.

Pain starts to splinter up my back and my chest tightens with panic even if I try to calm down.

It's only been a few seconds, and if I'm lucky I only have a few more left.

I can't tell if I'm breathing or not, but I try to break myself out of this spell I fall under more commonly than I would like.

I know I'm slowly getting closer when I can finally blink my eyes. I bat my eyelids just enough to feel myself snap out of paralysis.

Sucking in a short breath my hands darts to my back to ease the pain riding up my spinal cord.

It hurts like hell.

And even though I should be used to it after fifteen long years, I haven't. And it still scares the shit out of me.

When I'm certain the pain in my back has evened out I roll over and get out of bed. What I thought would be a quick power nap turned out to be a two hour slumber.

As much as I know I probably needed the rest, I dwell on the reckoning possibilities.

I remember a week during my freshman year at Cypress. I was naive to how quick college work can build up and slinging it with the party animals that were my prior teammates wasn't the best idea.

I almost failed half my classes if it wasn't for the constant all nighters I would pull to get back on track. The last thing I needed was a sit down talk with Coach Gerard and Ben Fraser, our head of athletics.

Given the strict warning I took it with consideration of not being able to start during the season. Something I was definitely not looking forward to.

The result of my all nighters included sporadic naps throughout the day, sleeping on any surface I found in my free time, and spending a big buck on coffee.

The amount of macchiatos I ordered in the span of a week was something my parents' wallet could afford, but definitely not mine.

I finally caught a break when Coach Gerard held me before practice started and told me to go home. He had seen the improvement in my grades and I didn't bother hiding the dark circles that formed under my eyes.

He gave me the day off and I reset after that.

The only reason I'm worried this nap might lead to many more is because of the lack of actual sleep I'm getting.

Work has picked up during the last week of summer classes and my measly attention span of under a minute isn't helping me.

I groan remembering the four tests I have to take this week—combined over two days, and walk out of my room.

My pace slows when I hear one of my roommates on the phone. "What do you mean she's in the hospital?"

I turn the corner into the kitchen and see Jordan with his phone to his ear, looking stressed. I nod at him and ask him who he's talking to.

He signals me to give him a minute before he ends the call. "Fuck man," he runs a hand through his hair, "Evie's in the hospital."

I pause opening the fridge and turn to him, "What?"

"Yeah, Braden said she didn't land right during practice." Jordan sounds bummed about it, but I'm trying not to look like I care so much.

But screw me and my will to care sometimes. "Well is she okay?" I find myself asking.

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