King Von Imagines

Excuses

You threw back the last sip of your drink and paid the bartender before heading onto the dance floor with your friend. It was late and the alcohol had taken the edge off your usual inhibitions and now you let go, your hips moving to the music as your hands rose above your head. "Having fun?" your friend shouted to you over the loud music and you nodded, grinning.

  It had been an unusually stressful few weeks; you were in the final year of getting your master's degree and the workload was tremendous. You'd hardly seen your friends, let alone your boyfriend, in weeks, months maybe at this point, but you'd just finished your most difficult final, and it felt good to finally relax.

    But then you spotted something; someone, rather- a familiar form in a loose t-shirt and torn jeans, a chain gleaming dully around his neck in the dim lights, a beanie pulled low over his eyes, and his arm around the shoulders of a woman in a short dress as he spoke into her ear.

     Hurt and rage bubbled up inside you and your feet led you straight over to his table. You slammed down the heels of your hands on the edge of the table, making both him and the woman jump and look up at you, she with confusion and he with... indifference? "You better have some hella good excuse for this," you snapped.

       He just shrugged. "I don't need an excuse; It's just what it looks like."

      Your mouth dropped open at the same time as you felt your heart sink, but Von just took another calm sip of his drink before saying, "If that's all, can you leave us alone?"

   You just stood there, speechless. Where was the warm Von you knew? What was even going on? You tried to summon your confidence as you answered, "Fuck you, Dayvon" But your voice wasn't as firm as you had hoped and you could feel tears welling in your eyes the instant you turned away. Your friend was waiting for you at the edge of the dance floor, her face filled with sympathy, and she wrapped an arm around your shoulders, guiding you way outside.

"I take it you saw him?" you asked bitterly as the chilly night air washed over you.

"I did," she said, "I'm so sorry."

You nodded, roughly wiping away the tears you felt overflowing.

"Do you want some company? I can stay over," she offered kindly, but you shook your head, saying,

"Thanks, but I'd prefer to be alone."

"Okay, if you're sure..." she said uncertainly.

"I am," you said firmly.

She gave you one more hug and then you walked back to your car.

You tried not to cry too much while you were on the road since you still had to be able to see properly. But when you got back to your apartment, you packed the things Von had left there into a single box, and then you peeled off your dress, climbed into bed, and sobbed.

You went to school on two hours of sleep the next morning.
*****

A week passed, a slow, miserable week. He didn't contact you; you didn't contact him. You didn't understand, and part of you didn't want to. Maybe it would be better for you not to know how long he'd been fooling around with other women.

But part of you just wanted him to come back no matter what had happened, even though you knew you couldn't let him.
*****

    One night you came home from work, hungry and tired, to find him waiting in the hall outside your apartment. You didn't look him in the eye, you didn't initiate a conversation. It was only when you felt his hand on your shoulder that you snarled, "Let go of me," before quickly keying in the code and hurrying into your apartment, slamming the door shut behind you.

Immediately there was a knock on the door but you did answer. You didn't know what he had to say, and you didn't care. If he was there for his things, too bad. You were planning on dropping the box off at his apartment when he wasn't there.

    But when you got up in the morning and left your apartment for your morning run, you found him sitting against the wall, his chin on his chest, fast asleep.

    You hesitated, unable to help but let the pitiful scene go to your heart. But then you turned to go and you were only a few footsteps from Von when he said, "Please don't go." His voice was scratchy from sleep and you cursed yourself for waking him up.
"Why?" you asked, turning back to face him as he stood stiffly. "What can you possibly have to say to me?"

"That I'm sorry," he said. "That I need you. That I love you."

Your eyebrows pulled together and you felt tears welling in your eyes. "How can you just say that after what you told me in the club?"

"I... That was a mistake," he said.

"Damn right it was a mistake," you snapped.

"I missed you," he said, his eyes locked on the carpet as he spoke. "I was lonely."

"So you naturally just ran to some other woman?" you asked. "Are you trying to justify what you did? It's not going to work, Dayvon! You can't justify that!"

"I know I can't," he said, ashamed. "I just... I'm trying to explain what my motivation was. It's not that I don't love you. I just... I missed you."

"That doesn't make any sense!" you exclaimed, "If you love me, why were you with her? And why did you act how you did when I confronted you?"

"I don't know; I was just... I was in the moment and I- I was mad at you for being so busy; I wanted to hurt you."

You just looked at him, disgusted. You shook your head. "You should leave, Von I have things to do."
"No, babe, please don't-"

"Don't you fucking call me that," you snapped as you walked away, forcing yourself to keep your shoulders straight and proud though you felt like balling up and crying.

You heard footsteps behind you and then his hand caught your wrist; he spun you around, wrapping his arms around you in a tight embrace. "I still only love you; I promise I'll never do it again. I-"

"It's too late," you said. "I can't trust you again. I can't. Everything's fucked up; it's-" You shook your head, pushing him away. "Go home, Von."

Tears streaming down your face, you walked away.