Royal Arrangement

9) NALINI~ A strong mask

I let the hot water wash over my body. The feeling of that disgusting man's touch lingered. I could feel my heart breaking in my chest. This wasn't the first time this happened and I was tired of it. My hands brushed my breasts and arse furiously. My arms, my back, my stomach. His lips were against my earlobe and I pushed the feeling away but it wasn't going anywhere. It made me feel disgusting, I rubbed the spot and I felt my skin burning from the scrubbing.

I let my tears being silenced by the shower. I heard a knock on the door. I came out of my trance. My heart skipped a beat. "Mrs. Shekhawat it's been an hour. What are you doing?" I heard the impatient voice of Kabir outside the door. I turned the shower off as I quickly put the robe on, making my way to the door. I tied the robe in place as I removed the shower cap off my head and threw it in the bin.

I took a deep breath, drying my face. I opened the door running a hand through my hair with a nonchalant expression. I saw Kabir, ready for bed. He frowned and I avoided those eyes which I knew would scan my soul without an effort. Before I took another step, he held my wrist as he pulled me back against the wall.

My heart skipped a slow beat when his cold hand touched my jaw making me face him and I still didn't dare look at him. I knew I would end up breaking the strongest mark I had put on. I knew I was hanging at a cliff, I'd either fall or he would pull me up. Both of those things would still result in the same thing, breaking my god damned mask.

"Look up." His voice was cold, unlike the feeling in my chest. I did. I saw his expression turning even colder. His hand reached for the rob around my neck and he pulled it down gently. His hand touched the skin under my jaw and it burned. I had overdone it. I hissed, gritting my teeth.

His eyes lingered on my skin. He turned his eyes to my face and I just stared at him, knowing damn well he understood everything despite the mute conversation between us. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before he pulled the robe down completely baring my shoulder to him. I held my hand against my chest stopping the robe to reveal any more.

"Nalini." He muttered my name as if he wanted to say something but I didn't want to hear it.
"Leave it. And get out of here I have to change." I pushed him gently covering my skin again. He did just that and I was grateful he didn't pester me more.  

"Fuck." I muttered as he left. Deep down I didn't want him to just go. I wished him to ask me if I was okay? And I wanted to tell him that no I wasn't. I wanted to let him in for once because I felt disgusted and It felt worse to be having someone yet not having them at all.

I walked to his closet and pulled out just another full sleeved sweatshirt. I silently put it on with my joggers as I walked outside. I picked up the lotion from the dressing table as I started rubbing it on my neck. Kabir wasn't in the room. I sighed.

I put the lotion everywhere, hoping it would heal the skin I had scrubbed away. I was about to step inside the bed when Kabir entered the room. "Sit." He ordered with even colder expression on his face.

"I am tired." I said ignoring his closeness while he stood beside me. I was about to slip in but he held my arm and pulled me down on his lap on the bed. "I said, sit." I gulped gently.

"Tell me what happened exactly." He said as his hands reached for my neck again. This time I felt something creamy against my neck. He was putting on a medicine. I smelled the medicine and frowned gently.

"Nothing much, than him getting blue-balled." I looked down at my hands. I was on his lap and yet his face was right in front of me. His muscles flexed whenever he moved and I felt every movement of them.

"Stop putting up an act Nalini, answer my damned question." He repeated impatiently. His finger rubbed against my neck as he undid the button of my shirt. I looked up in surprise. He ignored my stare as his hand rubbed the ointment against my collar and shoulder. I suppressed the building tension inside my body because of his touch. My body shivered from the gentleness of his hand against my skin. I thought about his question, trying to avoid the warmth building inside myself.