Dear Journal

6

Dear journal 

“Ella…” he calls me again, this time he is walking closer to me, “DON’T! DON’T COME NEAR ME WATARU!” I say trying so hard not to cry because I know that if he gets near me while I am like this those dumb ghosts will try and hurt him and although I can touch them I don’t think I can kill them. “Ella let me walk you home.” he says, but I don’t think I can answer. I stayed there quietly. All you can hear in the gym is the cries of Cindy and the other cheerleaders and even some of the jocks, those cries filled the gym and kept ringing in my ears, I couldn’t take it anymore. The only thing I could think about was Wataru walking towards me and the ringing noise of the crying jocks and cheerleaders. “SHUT UP!” is all that comes out of my mouth, shocked Wataru stops in his footsteps and says “Ella remember when we were in the park? When I told you I had something to say, I wanted to tell you now but not here so please...please let me take you home.” I am shocked more than anything “ok… fine” I only agreed because I want to know what happened and I want to get out of here.

Dear journal 

Yesterday Wataru finally told me what he wanted to tell me about that time in the park before his friends interrupted our conversation. “ I know you can see ghosts” he told me with a calm voice, “ I know because…” he seemed scared of telling me something so I told him he could trust me and then he told me “I can see them too and that time when that girl died you didn’t get her killed… I did.” After that he stayed quiet. I didn’t know what to say to him then I said “what do you mean? You weren’t even there, and we didn’t know each other before” he looked at me with calmness and like he was scared. “ I know you didn’t know me but I knew you…” that’s what he told me, I was shocked I didn’t know what to do or say I was frozen and he then he says “I knew you before we met Ella” 

Dear Wataru

What did you mean when you said “ I knew you before we met” how? How did you know me before and why did you say it wasn’t my fault that Kaleiy died? “ We met in Middle school, I was bullied a lot in 6th grade. The kids would say “What’s up fatso” and when you saw them pushing me around you stopped them” What? I'm so confused, 6th grade? I don’t remember anything from that time. “ If I didn’t get Kaliey killed then who did?” I ask him, I want to know who it is that killed her because all this time I believed I was the one who killed her. “I..I did” that’s what he said then got really quiet, I am really shocked but how did he kill her? “ what? How did you kill her? Are you a ghost or a reaper or something?” he just looks at me, still not saying a word. He seems upset, maybe because I don’t really believe he is the one who killed her. “Then what about Jace? And Kaden? Did you do that huh?” I keep asking him questions and he still doesn’t say a word. “ No…I didn’t kill those two but I did kill that girl…”  “ What? So what you're saying is that Jace and Kaden died because of me?” I am so confused, I have been thinking all this time that I  was the reason that that girl died. Should I be relieved that I didn't kill her? Or scared that I killed those two jocks?

Dear journal 

Wataru didn’t tell me anything more about what happened but he did promise me that I would know what happened and how he killed her, and how it wasn’t my fault. Well let me tell you about my day today, it was interesting I didn’t hear a word from any of the jocks or cheerleaders today. Maybe because of what happened the other day, I don’t think they will bother me for a while ethier. I heard that Kaden’s funeral is next week. I feel bad for what happened but I didn’t do it on purpose. As always if I don’t get messed with by humans then ghosts do it. I almost tripped and fell down the stairs because of John Doe, John Doe means that no one knows his real name… after school I walked home and I felt something telling me that a stranger was following me.