When Nadia Marsh; a cheerful and popular ice skater, is overtaken by a mystery illness, everything changes.
When everyone around her is training for sectionals; Nadia is house bound, where even the smallest effort leaves her feeling exhausted.
Getti...
"Today, tomorrow and forever, Long as there's stars above."
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───
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TW: This chapter contains a brief mention of suicidal thoughts.
NADIA'S POV:
I feel okay today. I have been able to move around by myself, without my legs feeling as though they are going to give out at any second. I have been able to eat and drink without feeling sick afterwards. My throat doesn't feel like it's burning me today.
I think I'm on an adrenaline high from being put on the Tonsillectomy list because I haven't felt this good in a while. I say I feel okay, I still feel like shit but the way I feel now is like I'm healthy compared to how I felt every other day.
I'll take feeling okay over feeling like i'm dying any day.
I'm glad, I hope it carries on like this. Hopefully today can be productive.
I go downstairs and everyone is shocked to see me. My dad nearly spits his orange juice back into the glass. "Morning," I smile at him and he simply just waves at me slowly, in what appears to be shock.
"Morning, Darl. I take it you are feeling okay today?" Mum asks and I nod at her with a small smile.
"Yeah, I feel like going to school today," I tell her and her eyes widen and I hear my dad choke on his sip of orange due to shock.
"Really? Do you think that's a good idea? You don't want to be paying for it when you get back home," She questions me. I know that she is looking after me but if she carries on asking questions like this then she will make me change my mind about it because she is right. I just want to do something today, I am sick of being stuck in the same four walls day in and day out. I need to get posters on my walls cause I am fed up with staring at plain white.
"I don't think it's a good idea, no. But I have to push myself if I don't want to kill myself," I tell her bluntly and the tears pool out of her. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say that."
I didn't mean to say it, no. But that doesn't mean I'm not thinking about it constantly. My life sucks, I feel like I am getting a new symptom every day. My headaches are always so constant and tight, it's like a helmet you can't take off.
I was chilling in bed this morning thinking about how I felt okay today and then my dog jumped onto my bed. I thought about the unbearable cliche I have become: an ill young woman with a dog that sits on her bed throughout her illness. That's when I got out of bed and decided I was going to college today, I'll push through the fatigue and pain. I need to prove to myself that I can do it. If I stay here then I don't know what I would do, it's terrifying being so trapped inside of your own body.
