Noxious

25 | bloody hands

Charly 

I was fucking foolish. 

From the moment I let Tommy convince me to stay the night, to the moment I pretended to be asleep when Rowan got up. I had listened to him go into the bathroom and then come back out to grab something from his backpack. 

When I heard the motel door click shut behind him, I sat up. 

He hadn't taken his whole backpack, which meant he wasn't leaving. That only made me suspicious. What was he doing? 

Was he meeting someone? 

I decided I needed to know. 

I stood up, withholding a groan from my stiff muscles straightening, and I checked to make sure Tommy and Kyle were still obliviously asleep. They sure had no idea about anything and I had no idea how they could sleep so easily. 

For a second, I scanned the room for Kyle's backpack. I still wanted to know what the fuck he was hiding but I could only spot Rowan's and mine. Kyle had hidden his somewhere, I silently cursed him.

Then, just as Rowan had done, I slipped from the motel room. 

I looked both ways in the parking lot and then I walked towards the end where I thought he might have gone. Most of the cars were still parked in the early morning light but a few had left since we came in a few hours ago. 

Suddenly, I heard a faint noise. 

I followed it around the end of the motel until I saw someone on their knees on the pavement. It was a small side street and I stopped just out of view when I realized it was Rowan. 

He was sobbing. 

I stopped breathing. He looked so broken right then. 

What had happened? 

Something within my heart ached for him and that was strange because I never felt for anyone. I didn't care and I told myself that every day. But, as I watched my sibling bash his fists against the concrete, I realized something had seriously hurt him. 

We had all been hurt. 

I contemplated approaching him. I wondered what I would say, how I would offer my... comfort? Would I call it comfort? I didn't know. I just felt like I needed to be there. 

But then, it suddenly vanished. 

He had gathered himself and he sat on the edge of the curb. In his hands, he held a lighter and there were papers on fire in his other hand. 

I recognized those papers. 

My heart came to a screeching halt but my feet were moving with the horrible realization that I was watching my own world burn. In the hand of my fucking sibling, of all people. 

"What the fuck are you doing?" I screamed, running towards him, "Those are my fucking emancipation papers! You asshole!" I fell to my knees, grasping the burning remnants of the papers as he let go of them, and fire burned the blood beneath my fragile skin. Without a second thought, I rose and my fist crashed into Rowan's jaw. "Motherfucker! You burned my only chance at freedom!"

"What--" He tried to say but he didn't get the chance because I punched him again. He fell backward and I sprung onto him. 

"I hate you!" I screeched, "I fucking hate you!" I couldn't stop myself, I was fueled by so much agonizing pain that I just kept hitting him. I landed punch after punch.