It has always been you

Chapter 4: Morgan

Morgan

I looked after him as he ran down the street. His white shirt clung to every bit of his skin. It all felt like a fantasy, he looked better than ever and all I wanted to do was kiss him. But I could never do that again. It didn't stop me from remembering his kisses though.

Soft and tender, rough and needy.

I gulped as I turned around and unlocked the door.

I walked into the flat, a bit of water pooling on the floor wherever I stepped. I walked directly into the bathroom and tried to get out of my drenched skirt and shirt, which was harder than I thought. I stepped into the shower, leaving my wet clothes on the floor and enjoyed the warm water streaming down my body.

Today had been eye-opening for me. Especially when Taron had told me I shouldn't care about what others thought of me, but do whatever I thought was right. That was basically my life mantra and had been the reason why I had chosen Evan five years ago. Yet I stood here and my heart was telling me Taron was the guy for me.

I shook that thought since it wouldn't lead me anywhere, yet I still shuddered thinking about how he had looked at me. Why was I so drawn to him since the second I met him?

One of the downsides of Evan's job as a heart surgeon was that we barely saw each other at times. I would have to go to work tomorrow morning and that would be the time when Evan would only come home. I felt lonely sometimes, but I was proud of what he did on a daily basis. He was saving people's lives while I was working in a book shop.

I made myself comfortable on our couch and turned on the TV. But nothing really took my mind of what had happened today.

Luckily, my phone rang. It was Ella.

"Hi you" I smiled "How are you?"

"I'm good" she said "How did it go today? Did you find a cake?"

I shivered at the thought "Evan was at work so Taron stepped in"

The line went silent.

"Taron was there?" she asked eventually

"Yes" I let out a breath "I don't know why he did it. Probably to do his brother a favour"

"How did it go?" she asked.

I sat up "It went well, I guess. I decided on a cake"

It was the truth.

"Morgan" she said understandingly "Are you sure it's good that you're alone with Taron?"

"I didn't plan this. I had no idea" I said, my voice stern.

"And?" she asked.

"And –" I sighed

I started to feel sad and had to stop myself from crying.

"Hey, what happened?" Ella asked quietly.

I threw my hand to my face "I don't know how to tell you"

My body was in overdrive. What was even going on with me lately?

"Did you kiss?" she asked calmly.

"No" I almost yelled "I would –"

I wanted to tell her I would never do that, but right now I wasn't so sure.

Letting out a breath I ran my hand over my face "Did I make the wrong choice all these years ago?"

"Morgan" Ella said quietly "It was your choice. And it was the right choice at the time"

"But?" I asked, my voice quivering.