In The Eye of the Beholder | Jonathan Crane

May 2007

Time has come for letting go

The hardest part is when you know

All of these years - When we were here

Are ending, but I'll always remember

-Time Of Our Lives (Tyrone Wells)

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I shouldn't have been drinking. Yet I was.

I sat at the counter of some run-down bar, slowly twirling the straw of my drink. All I'd been thinking about was him. That stupid man. That horrible, awful man I loved. That stupid Jonathan Crane.

When had he changed? Had it been when we were kids? Had it been when we apart? Thinking back, there had been small signs, but never had I thought he would do something as horrible as he did.

"He never meant for me to be there," I muttered to myself. "Bullshit. He probably enjoyed knowing I was afraid."

I suppose that's how he started down his descent into madness: fear. I knew Jonathan had a more than normal interest in it. I knew Jonathan was obsessed with his work, even if I didn't know what it was about. I should have done something. But I didn't. Somehow I convinced myself he was fine.

"How could I have been so blind?" I groaned.

"Blind to what?" a male voice asked from my right. A red-haired man sat beside me. Had he been there the whole time?

"None of your business," I muttered before going back to my drink.

"Was it a man?" he pressed.

"What's it to you?"

Did he not get that I wanted to be left alone?

"Is it not my civic duty as a gentleman to help a woman in distress?" the man asked. I decided to humor him.

"Yes. It was a man," I told him.

"I figured as much. What was it he did, besides break your heart?"

"Got himself arrested," I said softly, recalling our last meeting. Recalling the way Jonathan didn't seem to care about me.

"Oh, that's tough," the man said in a way that made it seem like he didn't actually care. "Might I ask for his name?"

"What for?"

"To ease my curiosity."

"Jonathan Crane," I said with a sigh.

"The Scarecrow? You're his girlfriend?" he said, sounding shocked. The Scarecrow? Is that what they were calling him now? I never would have guessed an old taunt would become a name feared amongst the people of Gotham.

"Was," I corrected.

"Well, I suppose you're lucky that I am here," he announced, a note of cockiness present in his tone.

"How do you figure?" I asked, still unsure of the man.

"I'm sure by the time you leave you'll have forgotten all about him. I am always willing to spare my time for a conversation with a beautiful woman," the man said, winking as he did. I tried to fight back a smile but failed.

The man had been right. As time went on, thoughts of Jonathan Crane left my mind. The man was good company; he was intelligent, charming, and admittedly attractive. He was cocky and perhaps had a bit too large of an ego, but he was nonetheless harder to talk to. He talked about things that were way above my understanding, but I listened anyway. It was astounding how much this man knew. I talked about my own job and my investigation of Arkham. He'd read the story. He told me it was a great feat of detective work from me.

I let the man walk me from the bar until it was time for us to part ways. As he was about to leave, I realized I never got his name, nor given him mine.

"Wait!" I called to him. "I never gave you my name. I'm Amber Connery."

I held out my hand for him to take. As he did, he gave me his name.

"Pleased to meet you, Amber. My name is Edward Nygma."

E. Nigma. I thought it was a clever play on words. I'm sure he knew that.

Walking home by myself was a dangerous thing to do. I knew that. Then again, I was living in Gotham. No matter where I went, I wouldn't be safe. Not even with the people closest to me.

Some would call the new start of my life a middle. I didn't believe in middles. Only befores and afters. And this was a before. What the after would look like could only be imagined.

I jumped at the sound of a gunshot. At least, I thought it was a gunshot.

I could only hope the next after would be better than the last.

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A/N: Here it is, the last chapter. I'd like to give a great big thank you to everyone who read this and gave their thoughts about it. I'll hopefully see you all in another story!