In Between Days: Raising Jordan (boyxman)✅

If I Should Fall from Grace with God

Jordan

Just before I opened my bedroom door, Tim quietly opened his door. We stared each other down for a few seconds, not saying a word. To prevent him from talking to Jamie, I pushed him into my room. Tim closed his door as quietly as he opened it. No words were spoken. I had nothing more to say to him, anyway.

"Don't you think you're being a little hard on your brother?" Jamie said. I didn't respond, removing my shorts instead. Before he said anything else, I pushed him on his stomach on my bed, quickly tugging down his shorts. As I pounced on his back, he laughed into my pillow. I clutched both of his hands in mine, holding them against the mattress. Rubbing my growing erection against him, I kissed the side of his neck hard, my lips clamping down on his skin.

"What's your favorite Pogues' song?" I asked in his ear.

"What?" he said with another laugh.

"My mom went through this Irish music phase," I said, still gripping his hands tightly. "For months all she listened to was U2, the Pogues, Thin Lizzy, the Undertones. She even shaved her head like Sinead O'Conner."

I must have been six or seven at the time, one of those times I'd never forget. Tim came home from school to find Mom's hair all shaved off and in a messy heap on the bathroom floor. It was too bad because she had beautiful hair before she took it all off.

"What the hell did you do?" Tim scolded her.

"I think it looks nice, don't you?" she said.

"No," he said. "You look like a cancer patient."

"What do you know?" she snapped back at him. "You never had good taste."

"You can't go to parent-teacher conferences like that," he said. Third grade parent-teacher conferences were scheduled that week. "Life's hard enough for him and you make it even harder." Having her own temper tantrum, Mom retreated to her bedroom for the rest of the day. In the end, Tim attended parent-teacher conferences in her absence.

"So what's your favorite Pogues' song?" I asked Jamie again.

"Fairytale of New York," he said.

"Typical," I said.

"It's the most romantic love song of all time," Jamie said and laughed at his own joke since most people wouldn't consider Fairytale of New York a love song. Rather, it was a song about two lovers who loved once, but whose love turned into bitterness, fueled with resentment and hate. It was still a great song.

"It's my favorite Christmas song," I said.

"But not your favorite Pogues' song."

"No," I said. "It's If I Should Fall from Grace with God."

"Interesting," Jamie said as I kissed the back of his shoulder. My lips trailed down Jamie's spine while humming the song of my favorite Pogues' song. He sighed into the pillow as I licked him there, just where he liked it. I thought I'd do to him what he did to me the other night. But then I had an idea and abruptly stopped, getting off him. "Where are you going?" he asked.

"Don't move," I said, going to my phone. Once my favorite Pogues' song played, I returned to Jamie, resuming where I left off. Judging by his sounds, I knew he liked it. I knew I must have been doing something right.

"Jordan," he moaned into his pillow as I made my way inside him.

"Jamie," I said, clutching his fingers again, holding them even tighter as I thrust slowly back and forth. He liked it slow and deep; that much I had learned over the summer.