Dead Poets Society - Imagines and preferences

Love Isn't Fair - Knarlie

Not too proud of this one, I think it sounds a bit funny but I'm putting it out here anyway because why not?

"Tonight, I met the most beautiful girl I've ever seen in my entire life."

The words hit Charlie like bullets, piercing through his skin and stabbing his heart. It only took him a second of observing Knox's dreamy face before he knew his friend was in love.

While all of the guys were rounding up around him, bombing him with questions - "What's her name?" "Is she pretty?" "Does she have a nice - " - Charlie leaned against the wall, rubbing the bridge of his nose. That was to be expected. Knox only saw him as a friend, anyway. Thinking that he actually stood a chance with him was absurd, unrealistic. A wince of pain flashes inside his chance, before he internally scolded himself. Get yourself together!

At that same moment, Dr. Hager came in, shouting "Five minutes, boys!".

As Charlie grabbed his stuff to leave, he managed to fake a smile and playfully punched his friend's shoulder. "Did you see her naked?"

"Very funny, Dalton," he groaned.

That night, as he tossed and turned in his bed, Charlie kept picturing Knox's face inside his mind. His soft traits, his childish yet entrancing eyes, his sweet laugh that sounded like thousands of beautiful bells jingling to make music.

Stop it!

The voice in his head brought him back to reality. There was no way Knox also had feelings for him. Not after tonight. And he was probably straight anyways.

"Shut up Dalton, I'm trying to sleep," groaned a muffled voice on the other side of the room.

"The heck are you talking about, Cameron?" he snapped in a low voice as he pushed himself up on his elbow to face his roommate. "I'm trying to sleep as well!"

"You're grumbling to yourself."

"Well, sorry," Charlie let out before turning his back on him to face the wall, gripping his blanket tightly against him.

As hard as he tried emptying his mind to fall asleep, he couldn't. The picture of his friend was printed on his retinas, and his heart was aching. How could his heart be physically hurting the way it did? It felt as if it were trying to beat its way out of his chest.

But it seemed wrong - very wrong. It wasn't right to have feelings for one of your best friends, and especially not since Knox now had a crush of his own. And it would not be a good thing to tell him - the last thing Charlie wanted was for their friendship to be ruined. He wasn't sure he could handle the rejection, either.

He sat up, flipped his pillow to the cold side and closed his eyes as his head heavily collapsed against the soft surface. On one hand, he only wished for Knox's happiness.... after all, wasn't love about wanting the other person to be happy? But part of him felt like it wasn't fair. That girl already had a boyfriend. It wasn't fair to Knox, who obviously had gone head over heels for her, and it wasn't fair to him, Charlie, who had had a crush his friend ever since he'd met him - back when they were only twelve and he didn't yet understand why he felt all funny whenever his friend was around.

Love wasn't fair. And deep inside he knew he could never be that girl, he could never be what Knox wanted in a partner.

"I'm not like her," he whispered in the dark, and a tear silently rolled down his cheek.