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Chapter 27 - I Can't Do This Alone

CHAPTER 27

CARLY

It was a good day.

I was feeling pretty good when I woke up at seven so after a long shower and some breakfast I made my way to the stables to catch up on all of the work I'd been neglecting ever since finding out about my pregnancy.

By the time evening rolled around and the boys came rolling back into the driveway, I was just about done with the evening's dishes, a pretty easy chore since I was eating alone.

"How did it go?" I asked when I went to welcome them on the porch.

"Fantastic," John grunted, slamming the truck door and making his way purposefully to the back of the truck.

I didn't miss the look that passed between Darryl and Steve. Something had happened. I looked at John; he looked rigid, his expression hard and stormy, like he was trying really hard not to punch something.

I looked at Darryl. He shrugged and started making his way towards me.

"What happened?" I asked.

"I uh... I don't know if it's any of my business," Darryl said a little uncertainly. He looked at John again and seemed to make up his mind, leading me towards the other end of the porch, further away from John and Steve so that we were out of earshot.

"Somethin' happened to John out there," Darryl said, his dark eyes locked on mine. "I don't know if it was the gunfire that triggered it or what... but uh... he kind of lost it... started yellin' stuff... I think he thought I was one of his old army buddies or somethin'... I think... I'm pretty sure he thought he was back in Afghanistan."

I stiffened.

"Okay... Thanks for tellin' me Darryl, I'll... um... talk to him," I nodded.

More often than not now he woke me up in the middle of the night with all of the tossing and turning that he did, and sometimes he'd wake up in a cold sweat, yelling out somebody's name. Sometimes it was someone named Mick and sometimes it was Alex.

Then, come morning, everything was fine again... or so he made it seem.

This was different though; they weren't just nightmares anymore. I was getting really worried about him and I didn't know what to do! I needed to talk to him but how was I supposed to do that? This was all new territory to me, and I didn't want to piss him off or scare him away.

Needing some time to think things through, I made my way to the barn, checking on the horses.

"Alright, we're all set!" John grinned when he came to join me twenty minutes later, showered and changed into clothes that didn't smell like... hunting. "Hope you've got a soft spot for quail baby, because we ain't runnin' out any time fast!" he chuckled.

"Yeah," I smiled, turning around to look at him. He looked calmer, more relaxed.

I hesitated for a second, trying to figure this all out. I couldn't help but think that maybe I shouldn't be talking to him about the incident in the woods just yet. Maybe I should do research first, figure out how to handle this situation... how to help him without pushing him further away.

"What?" John asked, seeing right through me.

Damn it!

"Nothin'," I shrugged.

"There's somethin', you're makin' that face you make when you're thinkin' too much," he said with a sly smile, closing the distance between us and putting both his hands on my hips.